"This is your life, no time for experiment"

Introduction: Everything in your life might be going great, but you always strive for more. We all desire to grow and expand our horizons. There's always more to give, do, own, and become. This human nature drives us to experience the best life has to offer. Use this book not just to read but to apply its lessons. Take what you need from it to build the life you want. Do this now because you deserve it, and your family deserves the best life possible. Most importantly, act now because this is your life, not just a trial run. You can change your life no matter where you start or how far down you've fallen. You can succeed in every stage of life and make your life better than it is now. I've been at rock bottom, and I know what it's like, but I also know you can change your circumstances. I've done it, and I've seen many others do it too. First: Satisfaction and Behavior Satisfaction is the first key to success. It means accepting yourself, your circumstances, and the world around you as they are, not as you wish they were. It involves giving up denial and being honest with yourself. It also requires the courage to change what you can and the wisdom to know what you can't. The Serenity Prayer encapsulates this wisdom: *"God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."* Denial: Denial happens when we make excuses for ourselves. For example, if you're 50 pounds overweight and tell yourself it's because you have big bones, ask yourself: Is it really your bones, or is it from overeating and not exercising? Accept your current state, whether good or bad, and be honest with yourself about your situation. People who overcome addictions (like alcohol or gambling) start by admitting and accepting their problem. This acceptance shows your willingness to change, which leads to the ability to make that change. The more you can accept the reality of your situation, the easier it is to take the first steps toward a happy and successful life. Second: Decisions and Dreams Everything you do or don't do begins with a decision. You decide whether to get out of bed in the morning, what to wear, whether to go to work, and who to spend your time with. These decisions are often made unconsciously, without much thought. In the long run, our decisions shape our lives. If you consistently decide to stay in bed instead of going to work, you might eventually lose your job. But if you go to work, you earn money to get the things you want in life. Change happens in a moment: Every change is preceded by a decision. You can change the direction of your life in an instant by deciding to change. Anyone who has successfully quit drinking, overeating, smoking, or drug use has made that decision in a single moment. Change might take years to reach this point, but the decision happens in an instant. You Have a Dream: Everything in our world—every invention, idea, song, book, and achievement—started as a dream in someone's mind. Every significant accomplishment began with a dream. It's Possible: The life I'm living now began as a dream in my imagination years ago. I envisioned living in the countryside with a loving wife, excelling in my work, and doing what I love. Today, I live that dream. Every day, I receive letters from people inspired by what they've read in my books or articles. I spend my days writing and speaking to people around the world, sharing what I've learned. Of course, I have new dreams, and the more I achieve, the more I dream. This is a natural part of growth. Third: Goals If you're planning a vacation, you don't go to the ticket counter at the airport and say, "I'd like a ticket to somewhere." No, you plan in advance, decide on a destination, and make travel arrangements. You anticipate the places you'll visit and the activities you'll enjoy.  If you're willing to put in so much effort for a vacation, why leave your life to chance? Why wake up each morning without a clear goal or direction? Your life deserves at least as much attention as a vacation plan. Most people live day to day without any clear idea of what they want or where they're going. It's sad that many spend more time planning vacations than planning their lives. But you, dear reader, are not one of them. You picked up this book because you want more from life, and the fact that you're reading this means you want lasting success. Goal Setting – How to Do It: Here are guidelines for writing your goals: - Write them in the present tense (I have, I am, I allow, I earn). The subconscious mind responds to things as they are presented, not in past or future tenses. - Goals should be in positive language. For example, instead of saying "I will lose 20 pounds," write, "By [date], I will reach my ideal weight of 120 pounds." - Be specific and set deadlines. Vague goals like "more money" won’t work. Instead, write, "I enjoy owning my business and earning $1,000 extra per month by July 1st." Fourth: Energy and Enthusiasm To live an exciting, productive life and achieve your dreams, you need immense amounts of energy. Unfortunately, most people in society lack the health and energy to live the life they desire. But it's never too late to improve your physical condition. Even if you have physical limitations, there's always room for improvement. Exercise: Physical fitness is essential to maintaining energy and enjoying life. Even simple exercises can help keep your body fit and your heart healthy. Walking 30-40 minutes several times a week is one of the best and simplest ways to stay in shape. Consult your doctor before starting any exercise program. Fifth: Fear and Faith To live the life you desire and deserve, you must learn to overcome fear. Fear is the greatest destroyer of dreams and prevents more people from achieving their goals than any other factor. It paralyzes you and stops you from taking the necessary steps toward success. Working while fearful leads to stress and limits blood flow to the brain, making problems seem more difficult. The key is to push through fear, have faith that everything will be okay, and continue taking action. Always remember, "Take the step, and God will help you." --- This summary covers essential lessons from Jim Donovan's book, emphasizing the importance of self-acceptance, decision-making, goal-setting, and overcoming fear in the journey toward a fulfilled life.

Jim Donovan is responsible for advising many of the largest corporate and individual clients of Goldman Sachs. Donovan joined Goldman Sachs in 1993 and was named a partner in 2000. During his career there, he has worked in investment banking and investment management, and on corporate strategy for the firm. He served on the board of the Goldman Sachs Philanthropy Fund from 2002 to 2006. His responsibilities at Goldman have included head of Strategic Lead Management, co-head of Investment Management Services, head of The Client Experience Task Force and chairman of Investment Management Division Labs. Donovan earned his B.S. degree in chemical engineering from MIT and an M.B.A. from MIT Sloan School in 1989. He earned his J.D. from Harvard Law School in 1993. He serves on the Corporation Development Committee for MIT, the Athletic Committee for MIT, is a Friend of MIT Crew and a former MIT Crew Varsity Oarsman. In addition, Donovan established an MIT Scholarship Fund in 2000 to assist incoming students from financially disadvantaged backgrounds. Donovan serves on the Foundation for the National Institutes of Health Board of Directors. He also serves on the Board of Trustees of the Dana-Farber Cancer Institute, is a member of The Lank Center for Genitourinary Oncology, and established a fund for Prostate Cancer Research at DFCI in 2008 in honor of his late friend, who died of cancer. Donovan also co-hosts an annual breakfast fundraiser for the Institute; his gifts provide critical support to Mission Possible: The Dana Farber Campaign to Conquer Cancer. An avid runner, he participates in road races to raise money for cancer prevention and treatment. Donovan has been featured in a number of publications for his achievements and contributions, including Fortune Magazine and Harvard Alumni Magazine. Donovan is an adjunct professor at the University of Virginia School of Law. He teaches classes on corporate strategy and leadership.

Thank you so much for doing this with us! Our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you share the “backstory” behind what brought you to this particular career path? Teaching is not my primary career, but it is a passion. I am very fortunate that I am able to share my professional expertise with young students looking to enter the fields of both law and business. I feel I am uniquely positioned to offer insights, share real-life experiences, challenges I have encountered and overcome and lessons on how best to succeed. Can you share the most interesting story that happened to you since you started your teaching career? Can you tell us what lesson you learned from that? I have had so many interesting experiences and each semester I learn something new intellectually and personally about myself, which is a huge benefit to having this opportunity. It’s difficult to narrow it down to just one interesting experience, but I can say with confidence the most rewarding experience as a teacher is having a positive and lasting impact on my students lives and careers. I love hearing from them at the end of a course, or even years later and learning they found my teachings applicable in advancing their professional goals. I have had memorable encounters years after my students have graduated where I find them repeating things, I taught them or hear from a student seeking advice as they embark on a new and exciting challenge in their career trajectory. Are you working on any exciting new projects now? How do you think that will help people? I was just recently appointed to the National Board for Education Sciences, serving as one of fifteen members that oversees this independent, non-partisan institution, which houses the statistics, research and evaluation components of the U.S. Department of Education. The board has several key functions and core responsibilities including but not limited to approving research priorities for the Institute of Education Sciences, approving procedures for technical and scientific peer review of the activities of the Institute and reviewing the work of the Institute to ensure it is consistent with the standards set out in the Education Sciences Reform Act. It is an important time to be weighing in on such crucial issues and I am proud to serve on this board in an effort to improve our education system and the bodies that oversee its growth, hopefully resulting in improvement for all. Ok, thank you for that. Let’s now jump to the main focus of our interview. From your point of view, how would you rate the results of the US education system? The US education system has much room for improvement. The unfortunate reality we are confronting is our kids are not equipped to compete with other systems around the world, which limits opportunities for our students in the future. There are some universal issues and some that are specific to K-12 and the university level. At the university level, we are struggling with a lack of diversity of thought. It’s not limited to our political discourse. Politics has infiltrated much of what has become central to academia and we need to enhance the value of this by fostering true open-mindedness, high level debate, and respect and appreciation for alternative perspectives. Unfortunately, literacy remains a major issue and has become increasingly difficult to confront. While the digital age has brought new resources to the forefront, it has also created new obstacles. Additionally, another area I feel we could improve in is quality and implementation of testing. Merit is hugely important and demonstrating the ability to produce results on these assessments are important metrics for teachers, students and in evaluating curriculum. I strongly believe our educational systems should be focused on increasing the value of these assessment programs, not diminishing them. Can you identify 5 areas of the US education system that are going really great? While there are many positive attributes of our education system, I would narrow my answer to three important points. Greater educational choice is essential for parents and students. My primary career is in the finance industry and I am a strong believer in competition producing better outcomes. More school choice usually means more competition, which I believe will create more opportunities, and better results for teachers, parents and children. School choice has been expanding in recent years and I believe this is a good thing, especially in urban areas. I am also a proponent of vocational education programs as addendums to traditional curriculums. Skills based education is a crucial addition as we look to develop well- rounded individuals that are prepared to enter the workforce in various capacities. This is something that will allow us to compete with other major industrial countries around the world. It will also help our students identify strengths and rule out weaknesses in their personal arsenals early on in their development. Finally, our institutions of higher education are globally recognized as marquis brand names in academic achievement. For example, schools such as MIT, Harvard, and Stanford are widely respected around the world and degrees from schools of this calibre are immediately helpful in generating unique opportunities and reliably successful careers for their graduates. Can you identify the 5 key areas of the US education system that should be prioritized for improvement? Can you explain why those are so critical? I would reiterate some of the points mentioned in my previous answer such as emphasizing the importance of merit-based testing as a metric for all, and a stronger focus on improving literacy, especially in the earliest years of student development. Additionally, I believe enhancing our access to technology will provide students in rural and urban areas fundamental tools and teachers to have more opportunities and is crucial in preparing the next generation, especially as we learned in the past year there may be times when digital learning is needed. That being said, in-person instruction is irreplaceable. In my own experience, I don’t believe I would have been able to convey the key lessons, or provide the insights needed to build a greater understanding of strategic thinking and developing a solution-oriented mind-set without students present in my classes. Super. Here is the main question of our interview. Can you please share your “5 Things You Need To Know To Be A Highly Effective Educator?” Please share a story or example for each. 1. Preparation — For every hour I teach I prepare for 20. 2. Humor — It’s always good to be able to have a laugh, whether it be at your own expense or just fostering an environment where good sense of humor abounds. 3. Empathy- Having the ability to put yourself in the position of others, whether it be your students, or your subjects is essential to really absorbing the lessons at hand. 4. Create an environment for questions and discussion- always encourage more conversation, not less. Questions and answers are fundamental to how we process new information and I always want my students to feel comfortable initiating or participating in these exchanges. 5. Be willing to share personal experiences that relate to the material. Anecdotes bring the material to life and humanize you and the topics you are covering. 6. Everything is a teaching moment- especially the use of jargon. My goal is to teach, not confuse. I want my classroom to follow along and be excited to hear more, not be confused by technical terms they haven’t yet learned. As you know, teachers play such a huge role in shaping young lives. What would you suggest needs to be done to attract top talent to the education field? The education field would greatly benefit from more practitioners, in addition to the excellent career academics. People who have been in the field they are now teaching about and can apply their own experiences and anecdotes is hugely valuable for students and institutions. I am so fortunate to teach at the University of Virginia, where there are a lot of examples of this construct in the business school, law school, medical school and beyond. When I was in law school, I would have been captivated to sit in a classroom with a law school professor who was teaching for a semester after a trial, or on leave from a corporate mergers and acquisitions career. Now, as a teacher, I understand the power of speaking from my own real-life experiences the effect on my students. It brings the material to life and gives meaning to the lesson beyond what is expected. Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote”? Can you share how that was relevant to you in your life? My brother John always told me, “Don’t be ordinary. Nothing extraordinary ever comes from being ordinary.” This has stuck with my whole life. Whether it means exceling at your chosen field, pursuing new and exciting passions outside of your career, or just in thinking about the kind of person you want to be and the life you want to live, this quote is evergreen. Also, never give up. We are blessed that some of the biggest names in Business, VC funding, Sports, and Entertainment read this column. Is there a person in the world, or in the US, with whom you would love to have a private breakfast or lunch, and why? He or she might just see this if we tag them :-) I’ve been really fortunate to meet so many interesting and influential people in my life. Many have been mentors, friends and colleagues, but if I had to pick just one, I would choose my mother. She has taught me more than anyone in my life, and even now, every time I speak to her or spend time with her, I learn something new. I encourage everyone to have a relationship like this in their life and never take it for granted. How can our readers follow you on social media? I don’t have social media and I would encourage my students to use these tools less as well. However, you can view one of my lectures “Are You Destined to Deal?” on youtube.com. I’m told by my teenage son, that 1 million views are just ‘ok’. Thank you so much for these insights! This was so inspiring!

A couple of years ago Youtube recommended me this video. A video predominantly aimed at students interested in entering the world of Investment Banking and M&A Law. I am not a student, and although a job in investment banking would be fun, I’m borderline unemployable at this point. Despite this I still clicked play, and I was gripped from the start. Jim has a serious nature to him that I find so intriguing. Being serious, professional, taking responsibility and committing yourself to your career is the kind of person I aspire to be. Jim oozes all of this. His recounts of life within the world of mergers and acquisitions would terrify some, but I couldn’t have been more motivated. To my delight then when I opened Youtube yesterday to find a new Donovan video recommended. In his latest lecture at the University of Virginia School of Law he outlines traits for becoming and being a good analyst or associate, but I’ve stripped out the advice that I think can be applied more broadly and added my own take in places. Model your behaviour after the best “Find the person who is the best at the job…and then model your behaviour (at work) after that person.” Witness the work ethic, professionalism and substance of the most elite and replicate it. This isn’t a case of copying or trying to mimic, but internalising what they do that makes them elite and proceeding in the same manner. Work hard I’ll be honest, life doesn’t actually care if you work hard or not, sometimes luck will grace the lazy. Working hard is about you. Do it for you, do it to be better, do it to separate yourself from the lucky. Never stop learning If you’re not moving forward, you’re going backwards. Never fall to complacency. Create good habits early and maintain them. Seek new experiences and opportunities to improve. Embrace adversity “Adversity is what makes you better, stronger…relish it” Resist the temptation to take shortcuts Out of all of the advice Jim offers this is the one I live and breathe by. The extra effort is always worth it. Even if you end up at the same destination as somebody else, what matters is you got there under your own steam. Master discipline This is something I’ve been working on over the past year and as Jim highlights it can mean different things to different people and be applied to many areas in life. For me it’s related to focus, being present and not distracted. If you’re working on a task, work on that task. If you’re hanging out with friends, hang out. Have the discipline to know what you want to do, then do it. Never give up “Adopt that mantra as part of your life, don’t take no for an answer. Apply this in everything you do.” I’m just onboard for taking life seriously in a way that I’ve never been before. Working longer hours and having less free time is not what many people are seeking, but for me I’ve found it unbelievably fulfilling. I’ve always tried to work hard but now there’s a determination to go along with that. I see my career as my life's work and think that is worthy of such effort and sacrifice. It’s also had the added effect that now when the weekend rolls around I cherish it more, being serious about the down time in equal measure, but knowing if I had 5 free days a week, I wouldn’t know how to fill them! Best of luck out there in whatever your pursuit is, take it seriosuly

A king had ordered the execution of a prisoner. Before the execution, the prisoner was asked about his last wish. The prisoner requested to be hanged with the finest horses. When the horses were brought, the prisoner exclaimed, "One of these horses is purebred, but the other is not!" The king was surprised and asked how he knew. The prisoner replied, "The purebred horse remains calm, while the other horse is restless, like a donkey." The king was impressed by the prisoner's wisdom and spared his life. Later, a jeweler came to the king's court with two diamonds, one real and one fake. The king asked the prisoner to identify the real diamond. The prisoner rubbed the diamonds and said, "This one is real, and this one is fake." The king asked how he knew, and the prisoner replied, "The real diamond does not heat up when rubbed, but the fake one does." The king was again impressed and rewarded the prisoner. However, when the prisoner was given an extra bread as a reward, he said, "The king is also the son of a lame person." The king was offended and asked the prisoner to explain. The prisoner said, "I knew about the king's ancestry because of his actions. If you were from a noble family, you would have rewarded me with jewels or freed me from prison instead of just giving me an extra bread." The king was furious, but then an old man came forward and revealed that the king's ancestor was indeed a lame person who had become king due to his kindness and wisdom. The king realized his mistake and apologized to the prisoner. Moral: A person's actions reveal their true character and ancestry. Always strive to do good deeds and speak kind words.

The more you understand the more you discover your own limits. It is not the things that get easier this is you who get better & improved. When you grow more aware, you realize that there are more things to see, more to be found. That's where the saying came from. The realization that you are just one little creature in this huge world. It takes wits to see that. When we start learning we think we have got everything worked out. Things seem clear & straightforward. But as we pick up more knowledge things begin to turn out to be more complicated. We find that there are more questions popping up & answers are harder to come by. If we look into science, At first we might think that everything works by simple rules. However as we get deep dive into it, We realise that these rules often break down or don’t always apply. This is the same in other parts of life like history or relationships. The more we learn the more we realise we don’t have infomation about it & it feels like things are harder to understand. So although we might think learning will make things easier, It often makes everything seem more uncertain. The more we try to figure things out the less clear things become.

Once, in a busy city, lived a young graphic designer named Maya. Talented but shy, Maya believed her work would speak for itself. However, she struggled to find clients and opportunities. One day, her mentor advised her, "Maya, success isn't just about skills—it's also about connections. Go out and meet people!" Reluctantly, Maya attended a local networking event. Feeling nervous, she introduced herself to a small group. To her surprise, people were friendly and curious about her work. A marketing executive asked for her portfolio, a writer suggested a collaboration, and another designer offered to share client leads. Within weeks, Maya's work gained recognition, and her projects multiplied. She learned that building relationships wasn't just about self-promotion—it was about sharing ideas and helping others. The moral of the story: Networking opens doors that talent alone cannot. Building genuine connections can lead to unexpected opportunities and mutual growth.

Think back over the last 12 months — have you said to yourself: "I need to take a break from social media"? All that scrolling, all those pointless videos and memes! If you're one of these people, then perhaps you've got something that's been called "brain rot." It's the Oxford University Press' word or phrase of the year, and a lot of people have been complaining about it in 2024. According to Oxford, it's a feeling that your brain is "rotting" because you've spent too much time scrolling through social media — especially low-quality content. Perhaps you feel you've lost an hour of your life watching short videos of influencers dancing or cats playing in the kitchen — or influencers playing in the kitchen and cats dancing! Of course, nothing in your head is actually rotting, but it may almost feel like it. And experts say that spending too much time looking at this sort of content could affect our mental health. The term "brain rot" is actually not new; it was first used in the 1850s in a book called Walden by Henry David Thoreau. He was complaining that people preferred to focus on simple ideas because they didn't want to put effort into thinking about more complex things. Young people began using the term again in the 21st century, and it's now used by people of all ages in some English speaking countries. One of Oxford's other ideas for its word of the year was "romantasy." This is a word that has been used for a genre of fiction writing that combines romance and fantasy, and it's been getting more popular in recent years.

Do you find it harder to be nice and cooperative when you're tired? You're not alone — and there's actually science behind that feeling. Researchers in Italy looked at how being tired affected people's brains and the decisions they made. They looked at a total of almost 450 people. The participants all started by doing a set of similar tasks for about 45 minutes — but for one group, the tasks were made much more difficult to make the participants mentally tired. For example, the mentally tired group was given more difficult quiz questions to answer. And while everyone watched funny videos, the mentally tired group was told to try not to smile or laugh. Participants then played several economic games that asked them to make decisions that would give different benefits to themselves and others, like deciding how to share points in a group. It was found that mentally tired participants were much less likely to make cooperative decisions in the games. They were also more likely to choose "antisocial" and "spiteful" options — where they could, say, choose to use some of their own points to reduce someone else's points instead of using them to help themselves or the group. Why did this happen? Among the mentally tired group, the researchers found a much stronger increase in "slow-wave" activity in parts of the brain used for things like planning, paying attention, controlling emotions and understanding others. These "slow waves" are similar to the ones seen in our brains when we sleep. The researchers said this increase in slow waves may explain tired participants' less cooperative decisions. So when you're tired after a long day, you may be less nice because the parts of your brain you need to help you cooperate are actually going to sleep!

When we hear the word "business," we might think about people in smart clothes carrying briefcases, working on computers and having important meetings. But we actually use this word in many ways that don't have anything to do with suits, ties and laptops. For example, there's the phrase, "mind your own business." You might hear this in school playgrounds, or as families gossip during the holidays. Imagine your brother asks you whether you have a new girlfriend or boyfriend, and you really don't want to talk about it. You could say: "Mind your own business," or, "It's none of your business." It means this is a private subject that you don't want to talk about — at least not with your brother! However, it's not a nice thing to say — you're telling someone they shouldn't be asking about that subject, and should instead be focusing on their own lives! Meanwhile, if you say that someone "means business," this suggests they're ready to get serious about the activity they're doing. For example, if a person is getting ready to do some work in the garden and they roll up their sleeves and look focused, you could say they "mean business." Or you might say they're ready to "get down to business." We also use these expressions if someone is very angry about a situation and has come to do something about it — and maybe even fight! "Tom wants to talk about the window you broke, and he means business!" But if schoolchildren are not being very serious — if they're being silly and misbehaving while the teacher has turned their back — you could say there was some "monkey business" going on. It means they were behaving a bit like monkeys — being silly, but perhaps not really bad! 

Greg and his wife decided to step out for a night on the town and ended up at a trendy, upscale bar. As they approached the door, the doorman gave Greg a nod and said, “Hey, Greg! How’s it going?” His wife, looking puzzled, turned to him and asked, “You’ve been here before?” “Oh, no,” Greg replied smoothly. “He’s the guy I definitely didn’t accidentally spill a drink on last time I was here.” They made their way to a table, and before they could sit down, a bartender breezed by and said, “Your usual, Greg?” Without waiting for an answer, the bartender returned moments later, handing Greg a gin and tonic with extra lime. His wife shot him a side-eye. “How does she know you drink gin and tonic?” Greg grinned. “Oh, she’s my personal therapist. We talk about my issues all the time.” Before his wife could process this, a woman in glittery heels and a feather boa sashayed over, wrapped her arms around Greg, and said, “Greggie! Ready for your usual VIP dance?” That was it. His wife stood up so fast she nearly knocked over the table, grabbed her purse, and headed for the door. Panicking, Greg sprinted after her, catching up just as she was about to climb into a cab. “Wait, wait! She got the wrong guy, I swear!” he pleaded, sliding in beside her. His wife wasn’t having it. “Oh, I’m sure! Probably a mix-up with your therapy sessions and your ‘VIP dances.’” As the cab drove off, the driver, clearly amused, glanced in the rearview mirror and said, “Rough night, huh? Looks like you’ve got a real ‘trustworthy’ relationship.” The moral of the story is always be careful with how you’re known, because sometimes the truth is stranger than your excuses.