The Vortex

Download the book:- The Vortex (A guide to interpersonal relationships) https://drive.google.com/file/d/1RQEFmhdAubuuUQE_7QqCSVrE0Wlicu7S/view?usp=drivesdk 1 @Why Does the Relationship with Abraham Feel So Right? Jerry: I know that there are many forms of, and reasons for, mating. There are marriages of convenience; arranged marriages; and marriages resulting from physical attraction or sexual lust, with high emotions exploding . . . and some people find mates because they just don’t want to be alone. 2 But Abraham, I’ve been thinking about the absolutely perfect relationship that I have with you. Is it possible for those of us who are, right now, focused in our physical bodies to see others who are physical in the way I see you? In other words, can we get past the specific details, somehow, and get to the essence of a physical Being so that we can have the harmonious relationship with one another that I feel with you? 3 Abraham: You could not have asked a better question at this point in our conversation because what you are describing in your appreciation for what you are calling “Abraham” is the alignment between you and You that we have been talking about. Your appreciation for us is not because we are behaving in pleasing ways for you, for there are many people who do not feel appreciation for, or alignment with, us. 4 Some are not pleased with us when they realize that we will not do for them. (From their feeling of shortage or lack, they could plead for miracles or help from us that they would not find.) Others find us annoying because we are very clear about who we are and about what we want—and we are unyielding. We are not willing to set aside our intentions—which we have established over all that we have lived—to satisfy a whimsical desire of someone who is asking in this moment. 5 We will not pretend that the Laws of the Universe do not exist as they do for the sake of entertaining you in this moment. And so, there are many who, as they interact with us, find negative aspects within us. And, as a result of their looking for and finding lack, our relationships are not satisfying. 6 The reason you feel that you have a perfect relationship with us is because you are currently focused upon the aspects of us that resonate with who-you-really-are. But you have the ability to hold anyone as your object of attention and do the same thing. It is your focus that is responsible for the way you feel about us, not something we are projecting to you. 7 When you are interacting with any others, it is always to your advantage to look for their positive aspects. By activating the Vibration of wanted things, more of those wanted things will flow into your experience. When you discover the art of looking for, and finding, positive aspects in others—so much so that you develop an expectation for positive things from others—only positive things can come to you. 8 Jerry: So, what I’m hearing from you is that the relationship I have with you, from my perspective, is a sort of self-love? Abraham: Perfectly stated. By your appreciation of that which we are, you have come into alignment with who-you-really-are. And that is what love is: alignment with Source, alignment with self, alignment with love. 9 Jerry: So, in other words, from what I want in life, I have attracted you or am attracting from you that which fulfills me? And would you call that a form of codependency? Abraham: Dependency indicates that “I am not whole, in and of myself,” and that “I am needing another in order to be whole”; and that is not the case with you or with us. In fact, this question really points us toward a very important premise, or basis, for good relationships: When people feel insecure in their singularity, and so seek a companion to shore them up, the relationship is never stable, because it is on an unstable footing. 10 But when two people who are independently secure and in alignment with their respective Inner Beings join together, now their relationship has a solid footing. In other words, they are not dependent upon each other for resources. They are getting those resources from Source, and now they can interact and co-create from that solid basis. 11 When two or more minds come together that are positively focused upon a subject, those two minds are many times more powerful than one-plus-one. And so, the attraction of ideas and solutions goes beyond the sum total of the two individuals. It is truly exhilarating. And it is really what co-creating is all about. 12 Something that is very basic to productive co-creating is that the individual creators who are coming together must be in a place of positive attraction before they come together, or nothing positive can come out of the co-creation. If you are negatively focused and therefore not feeling good, you can only attract others who are in the same state of negative attraction. That is why looking for a mate from a place of insecurity, or lack of anything, can never bring you the mate you really want, but instead brings one who amplifies your current lack. 13 People are often confused because they think their discomfort is about not having a mate. So then when they achieve the physical action of finding a mate, they do not understand why their discomfort does not subside or why it gets bigger. The physical action of mating, or moving in together, or marriage, cannot fill the void that exists when you are Vibrationally out of alignment with who-you-really-are. But if you have tended to that alignment first, then the physical action of co-creating can be sublime. In other words, do not take the action in order to fix misalignment. Fix misalignment and then find a mate. 14 @Shouldn’t a Soul Mate’s Mind Be Beautiful? Jerry: I hear people refer to “Soul Mates.” When two people who are very positive in their thought attract one another, is that a form of what people call Soul Mating? Abraham: Often when people speak of finding their Soul Mate, they infer that there is one specific person that they are meant to be with—a sort of soul alliance that they formed before they came forth into this physical body in this time-space reality. 15 And while it is true that you do have intentions to rendezvous with others for the purpose of specific co-creating (and rediscovering those relationships can be tremendously satisfying), you were not looking to those physical rendezvous as the source of your alignment. Instead, you intended to accomplish a consistent alignment first, understanding that then you could attract those relationships into your life. 16 You could be in the presence of a person with whom you had a Non-Physical alliance, and if you were disconnected from your Source, you would not recognize the relationship. Often the people with whom you feel the greatest annoyance or disharmony are actually your Soul Mates, but, in your lack of alignment with who-you-really-are, you do not recognize them. 17 The best way to approach the idea of a Soul Mate is to seek alignment with the pure, positive Vibration of the Soul, or Source, within you; and then, by the allowing of that alignment, you will recognize every opportunity for these wonderful rendezvous, just as you have intended. The simple intention to find things to appreciate would put you in continual alignment with your Source and in the perfect position to attract your Soul Mates on myriad subjects. 18 Remember that even though you are new to this physical body, you are actually a very old Being who has experienced a tremendous number of life experiences, and through the living of all of that life, you have come to powerful conclusions. Your Inner Being now stands in the knowledge of all of those conclusions; and through your alignment with your Inner Being, you, too, have access to that knowledge—and anything less than that is out of balance and will not feel good to you. 19 @Nothing Is More Important Than Feeling Good Jerry: And so, what would you say to young people who are just out of school, beginning their lives, seeking their first mate or between mates? How would you guide them regarding their relationships? Abraham: — First, we would remind them that nothing is more important than that they feel good, because unless they feel good, they are not in alignment with all that they have become, and anything less than that alignment will always feel lacking. 20 — Next we would encourage the continual setting of an intention to find good-feeling subjects to focus upon, and if a not-good-feeling subject should be activated within them for any reason, to do their best to distract themselves from that by looking for relief by focusing upon a better-feeling subject. 21 • For example, let us say that you observe an unpleasant relationship in progress, and you hear the negative conversation of this unhappy couple. Your desire for harmony, and even your more specific desire for a harmonious relationship, causes your involvement (by your listening) in this unpleasant experience. 22 The negative emotion that you would be feeling is your indicator that this focus is not helpful to you. If you have in place an active intention to feel good, you would easily move yourself out of earshot of this conversation. You would deliberately turn your attention to other, good-feeling objects of attention. 23 — We would remind them that creating occurs from the inside out. In other words, the thoughts you think and the way you feel are at the center of what you attract. Rather than looking for things outside of you that cause you to feel better, it is much easier to decide to feel better first and then attract, from the outside, things that do. 24 — We would encourage a time of focusing upon what is wanted before jumping into any action. When you take action as you focus upon what you do not want, you only get more of what you do not want. But if you take the time to focus upon what you do want before you take the action, then the action that is inspired will enhance your desire. 25 — We would also advise them: • As you move through your day into the variety of changing segments that make it up, stop often and restate to yourself your intention to feel good and to stay in alignment with your Inner Being or Source. 26 • Let your desire to feel good be the dominant intention that is present no matter what else is occurring in that segment. And remind yourself, often, that it is up to you to make that Connection and to feel good, and that no other person has a responsibility or the ability to make that important Connection for you. 27 • Look to your relationships with others as a way of enhancing the alignment you have already achieved, but not as a means of accomplishing the alignment. • Independently, by your own focus with Source, reach the consistent place of loving yourself. Do not ask others to love you first. They cannot. 28 The dominance of your thoughts is what brings everything to you and is what is behind the action that you offer. By seeking good-feeling thoughts that align you with your Source—your action will then always feel good. You cannot muster enough action to compensate for misaligned thought, but action that is inspired from aligned thought is always pleasurable action.

29 @She Wants Someone, but Not That One Jerry: Okay, so what would you say about a woman who seems to feel good about herself, who continues to express her desire for a mate, but who disqualifies them, one by one, as the parade of men moves through her experience? 30 Abraham: Her desire for a mate keeps the men coming, but her belief in bad relationships causes her to push them away. And her attention to unwanted characteristics makes it impossible for the characteristics that she desires to come to her. 31 If she is continually focusing upon what she does not like in the men coming to her, her chronic attention to the lack in others is keeping her from being in alignment with who-she-really-is. And under those conditions, she cannot be feeling good about herself or about anyone. 32 Finding lack in others is not the path to liking what you see in yourself. If you are a person who has trained yourself to look for positive aspects, you will find them in yourself as well as in others. If you are a person who has trained yourself to look for negative aspects, you will find them in yourself as well as in others. Therefore, it is always accurate to say that no one who is critical of others really likes themselves. It defies Law. Whenever you see those who are very critical of others, you are actually seeing people who do not like themselves. 33 The appearance of a superior attitude you sometimes see, which causes you to think that people really like themselves, is often their way of covering up the insecurity or lack of alignment they are feeling. When you really like yourself, you are in harmony with the Source within you; and when that is the case, your appreciation of others flows abundantly—and when that is the case, wonderful things flow steadily to you. 34 When you are in alignment with your Source, the Law of Attraction can then only match you up with others who are also in alignment with their Source, and the ensuing relationship is then one of satisfaction and delight. But when you are out of alignment and feeling bad, the Law of Attraction then can only match you up with others who also feel bad, and those relationships are unpleasant and uncomfortable. 35 You want to co-create with one another, but if you are not tending to your own personal alignment, then co-creating with others only exaggerates your misalignment. Interacting with others adds immeasurably to the expansion of your planet and to All-That-Is, and yet, most people deny themselves the pleasure of co-creating because of their attention to the unwanted aspects of those around them. 36 In other words, for the most part, you are focused upon the worst in one another rather than the best of one another. And the reason for that is, you have not found your centered place before you came together, and so when you come together, you perpetuate the imbalance in one another. 37 @Relationships, and the List-of-Positive-Aspects Process Whether you are currently without the relationship that you desire or in the middle of a relationship that does not please you, there is nothing that you could do that would be of greater value in moving you in the direction of the relationship that you want than to take a notebook and spend time every day writing the positive aspects of the people in your life. 38 Make lists of positive aspects about the people around you, the people from your past, and yourself. And, in a very short period of time, you can demonstrate to yourself the power of your aligned thought and the cooperative nature of the Law of Attraction. By releasing all effort toward the futile control of the behavior of others and, instead, focusing the power of your positive thoughts, you will find the delicious relationships that you have been dreaming about. 39 You are the thinking, vibrating attractor of your experience; and the thoughts you think determine everything about the life that you live. As you turn your attention toward the positive aspects of the personalities and behaviors of others with whom you share your planet, you will train your point of attraction in the direction of only what you desire. 40 The relationships that you desire are not only possible, not merely probable—they are certain. But you must train the frequency of your thought-Vibration into alignment with those desired relationships if you are to experience them in the tactile, physical, “real life” ways that you desire. Not only does the power of your thought determine which people make their way into your life, but the power of your thought determines how they behave once they get there. 41 @By Virtue of My Vibration, I’m Attracting Jerry: In my early experience, I remember observing a common pattern where it seemed like most people were not interested in having a relationship with the people who wanted to have a relationship with them. It seemed like every boy was interested in a girl who didn’t want him, and every girl wanted to be with a boy who didn’t want to be with her. 42 Abraham: Well, the best part about your observation is that the contrast of their experiences was helping them to more clearly identify what it was that they each did want. This rather common scenario occurs because most people believe that in their search for the “perfect mate,” they must root out the imperfections. 43 They believe that by identifying what they do not want, and then by keeping a list of those unwanted characteristics, if they sort long enough, they will arrive at their desired destination of the “perfect mate.” But the Law of Attraction does not allow that. 44 When the list of what you do not want in a mate is the dominant Vibration that you are offering regarding mating, the Law of Attraction will bring you a continuing string of unwanted partners. It is necessary to use your own self-discipline in directing your thoughts to the positive aspects of your current relationships before more of what you do want can come to you. 45 Over time, through your interaction with a variety of relationships, you have certainly identified many characteristics that you do not want in a partner. And each time your experience has helped you to identify what you do not want, you have been emitting a Vibrational request for what you prefer instead. As a result of all of those relationships, both those you have personally lived and even those that you have observed that others are living, you have created a Vibrational version of your “perfect mate.” 46 And if you could then give your undivided attention to that version, the Law of Attraction would bring to you only those who match that version. But if you continue to focus on the flaws or unwanted characteristics of those people, you will hold yourself apart from what you really want. 47 When we explain that the fastest way to get to the relationship you really want is by finding appreciation right where you stand (you may be in a temporary relationship, or you may be currently without any relationship), people often resist because they believe that if they say nice things about where they are, somehow they will get stuck right where they are. But that is not how it works. 48 When you look for, and find, positive aspects in your current situation, you are actually using your current situation as your reason to be a Vibrational Match to your own Vibrational Escrow, to who-you-really-are, to your Inner Being, and to everything you really desire. Feeling good about where you are is the fastest path to even greater improvement. 49 But when you find fault with what is going on in your current life experience, the negative emotion you feel is your indication that your current thought and current Vibration is holding you apart from your own Vibrational Escrow, from who-you-really-are, from your Inner Being, and from everything you really desire. 50 The reason why “the grass always looks greener on the other side of the fence” is because many people have developed very strong tendencies toward complaining about what is on their “side of the fence." 51 @But What about When Others Choose Our Mates for Us? Jerry: I’d also like to hear your comments on the cultural aspects of mating. There are many cultures where the parents, or the adults in the communities, choose the mates for their children; whereas, in our culture, we believe more in romantic love, where we fall in love with someone and choose our mates because we have fallen in love with them. 52 Abraham: Of course, it feels better to you, and therefore feels right to you, for you to be the one to choose your mate—or anything else, for that matter. But even in your culture or society, where you believe that you are freer to choose your mates, you are still very much bound by the beliefs of those who surround you. 53 In other words, there are many within your freer-seeming culture who would not dare to marry outside of the wishes of their parents, religion, or culture. But we do agree that your society does allow more leeway than some others. 54 But there is an even more important thing we would like you to consider regarding the “choosing” of a mate. You are not making your choices with your words, but instead, with your Vibrational offering. And so, sometimes, without realizing it, you are actually “choosing” the exact opposite of what you really want. 55 For example, people “choose” cancer—not because they want to experience the disease of cancer, but because they “choose” to give their attention to resistant thoughts that disallow the Well-Being that would be there otherwise. And so, in a similar way, people choose unpleasant partners because of their chronic attention to what they do not want, or their chronic attention to the absence of what they do want. In other words, a person who often feels lonely is a person “choosing” the absence of something very much wanted. 56 @Finding, Evoking, or Being the Perfect Mate Jerry: So how would you recommend that someone find the “perfect mate”? Abraham: In order to find what you are calling the “perfect mate,” you must first be the perfect mate. In other words, you must consistently emit a Vibrational signal that matches the mate you desire. 57 The not-so-perfect relationships that you have observed, or lived, have given you wonderful opportunities to decide and fine-tune the kind of relationship you would like to have. And so, you have only to think about those wanted characteristics of a relationship in order to train your own Vibration into one that matches your desire. 58 When you point out what you do not like in relationships, or remember unpleasant events from past relationships, or even watch movies where people are mistreating one another, you are unwittingly training your Vibration away from your desired relationship. And you simply cannot get there from there. 59 You cannot get the relationship of your dreams when your chronic thoughts about relationships feel lonely or angry or worried or disappointed. But as you look for things you appreciate in yourself and others—as you make lists of positive aspects of past and present relationships—you train your Vibrational offering to match the Vibration of your desires, and your “perfect mate” must then come. It is Law. 60 @Wanting a Mate, or Needing a Mate [The following are examples of audience members’ questions at an Abraham-Hicks workshop.] Questioner: So it seems like my wanting someone pushes them away, but my not wanting them brings them to me. Why does that happen? Abraham: When you want someone but the dominant thought within you is about the lack of that person—then your most active Vibration holds him or her away from you. 61 When you do not want someone, but the dominant thought within you is about this unwanted person pursuing you—then he or she is drawn closer to you, by you. . . . You are getting the essence of what you are thinking about, whether you want it or not. 62 Questioner: Is this similar to the distinction between wanting and needing? Abraham: Yes, and that is a good way of thinking about this. When you want something and are thinking about how wonderful it will be to have it, your current emotion feels good because your current thought is a Vibrational Match to your true desire. But when you want something but are currently thinking about not having it, about the absence or lack of it, your current emotion feels bad because your current thought is a Vibrational mismatch to your true desire. 63 The difference between wanting and needing is not just speaking different words. A pure state of desire or wanting always feels good because you are a Vibrational Match to what is in your own Vibrational Reality. A state of need always feels bad because you are a Vibrational Match to the absence of your desire and are therefore a mismatch to your Vibrational Reality.

64 @Is There a Way of Staying Positive Around “Lackful” Others? Questioner: How can I remain positively focused when my mate is predominantly focused on lack and makes no effort to be positive? And it gets to me—it’s hard not to also feel lack. Abraham: We know that it is easier to feel good when you are seeing or hearing something that causes you to feel good, but it is extremely liberating to show yourself that you have the ability to feel good in any situation even when those close to you do not. 65 You will discover that it is far easier to learn to direct your own mind than to arrange, through action, the people with whom you spend your time. Even if there is only one person who is with you often whom you need to train, you could not train him or her sufficiently. 66 And, of course, there are many more persons than one to whom you are having an emotional response. When you do become adept at directing your thoughts to things that are pleasing, the unpleasing people (or unpleasing aspects of those people) will leave your experience. It is your attention to the unwanted that holds it in your experience. 67 Many people disagree about that when they first hear it, because they believe that negative things are in their lives because someone else is putting them there: “My abusive husband asserts himself negatively into my experience.” 68 But we want you to understand that if you use your power of focus to withdraw your attention from the negativity or abuse, and put your attention upon positive aspects, instead—the abuse cannot remain in your experience. It is empowering to discover that any and all negative aspects stay in your experience only because of your attention to, and therefore continuing invitation of, them. 69 We acknowledge that holding positive thoughts in the midst of negative conditions is not easy. Especially in the beginning. The best time to begin to make the effort to direct your thoughts really is not when you are the middle of a negative situation. It will be easier for you to reach for better-feeling thoughts when you are alone: Begin by trying to remember when you did easily feel good about this person. And if you cannot find that beginning place, then choose another topic altogether. 70 The first thing that is necessary to break a negative trend and start it in a more positive direction is the acceptance that your thoughts do create the reality that you live. Next you must accept that you do have the power to direct your own thoughts. And then, what is required is a willingness to direct your thoughts in the direction of what feels better until that pattern is established within you. 71 One of the most exciting things about beginning the process of deliberately focused thought is that the Law of Attraction will bring you evidence of your improved thought immediately. And while old patterns may be hard to break, and you may slip back into those old patterns from time to time, the evidence of your effort will be undeniable to you. And, before long—with much less effort than you spend trying to dodge negative conversations, or train another into better behavior—all of your relationships will improve. 72 @A Brief Bedtime Exercise That Transforms Relationships As you lie in your bed before sleeping, if you will think of good-feeling things from your past or present, or even speculate into your future, you will set the tone of the Vibration in which you will awaken in the morning. 73 In the morning, when you first return to Consciousness, try to remember what you were thinking about in the evening, and make an effort to reestablish that positive trend of thought. This one small exercise will change the way everyone you meet responds to you in this new day. And as you do that—night after night, and then morning after morning—new patterns will emerge, and your relationships will transform. 74 @What Am I Expecting from a Relationship? You have the power to evoke from others the relationships that you desire. But you cannot get to a new-and-improved situation by giving your attention to the current situation. The Universe, and all physical and Non-Physical players in it, is responding to the Vibrations that you are offering; and there is no distinction made between the Vibrations that you offer as you observe, and the Vibrations that you offer as you imagine 75 . . . . If you will simply imagine your life as you want it to be, all cooperative components will be summoned. And even more important, all components that are summoned will cooperate. It is Law. You have the power to evoke from others a relationship that is in harmony with the freedom, and the growth, and the joy that you seek, because within each of the others are those probabilities. 76 Within each of them is the probability of someone being very understanding—or not. Of someone being very pleasant—or not. Of someone being very open-minded—or not. Of someone being very positive—or negative. The experience that you have with others is about what you evoke from them. 77 Have you had the experience of behaving with someone in a way that you had not intended? It just sort of came out of you suddenly. That was you experiencing the power of influence from another’s expectation. Have you noticed the personality of a child changing depending on which adult it is interacting with? Cooperative and pleasant with one person, and obstinate and cranky with another? You were witnessing the power of influence from another’s expectation. 78 When you train yourself into steady alignment with your own Broader Perspective, you will tap into the Energy that creates worlds, and you will be pleased by the positive response that you receive from those around you. No longer blame others with whom you share relationships; and instead, acknowledge that you are the attractor of your experience. True freedom comes from that understanding. 79 As you tend to your relationship between you (in your physical focus) and the Broader Perspective of your Inner Being, as you train yourself into the good-feeling thoughts of your Source, as you come into alignment with who-you-really-are, as you learn to love yourself—the others with whom you interact will not be able to buck that current of Well-Being. They will either love you back—or they will gravitate out of your experience. 80 @What Are the Desired Characteristics of a Perfect Mate? Jerry: Is it possible for one person, the same mate, to continue to be our perfect mate even though we are growing and changing and evolving? I mean, there was a time in my life when I was an acrobat, and I had to be able to throw my partner high and catch her, and so she had to be under five feet tall and weigh under 98 pounds. 81 And when I met Esther, many years later, none of that was relevant anymore. Other things attracted me to Esther. And so, she was the perfect mate at the time she came into my life. So it seems like monogamy, or being with one person forever, could be pretty challenging. 82 Abraham: As you are moving through the details of your life experience, you are continually generating new preferences from the details of your new, current experiences. That process never stops. Those rockets of desire are received and held by your Inner Being, in your Vibrational Reality. In other words, every new experience causes you to amend, in small and large ways, your new version of the life you desire; and your Inner Being never ceases to keep up with the new version. 83 As you, through the power of your focus, hold yourself predominantly in an attitude of feeling good, you stay up to speed with your own Vibrational Reality, and so it continues to unfold and present itself to you in natural and comfortable ways. 84 In other words, you have a continuing feeling of This is the next logical step as you allow the perfect unfolding of your own life experience. And so, it is possible that a new partner is “the next logical step” for who you have become, but if that is the case, the releasing of one mate and the receiving of another would not be an uncomfortable or unpleasant situation. 85 It is a rather illogical and impossible standard that your culture seems to want to hold you to when you make the statement: “I will stay together with you, in sickness . . . [no matter the situation] until death do us part.” A much better intention or vow would be: “It is my dominant intent to focus my thoughts in a positive direction so that I maintain my Connection with the Source and the Love that is really who I am. 86 And in doing so, I will always present the best of myself to you. It is my desire that you ask the same for yourself. And it is my expectation that as each of us works to maintain our individual alignment with who-we-really-are, our relationship with one another will be one of continual and joyful expansion.” 87 @Do Nature’s Laws Not Govern Our Mating? Jerry: For much of my life I have been trying to determine what is the natural and right way for humans to approach relationships. I looked at the other beasts that roam the planet and have noticed that, for the most part, they are not much for monogamy. The elephant runs off all of the other male elephants, and the rooster will fight to the death any rooster that interferes with his flock of hens. 88 I’ve wondered, If humans were to behave more like the animals in regard to mating, would the human species become stronger and more powerful, like in “the survival of the fittest” with the animals? From the perspective of the Non-Physical, is there a right and wrong approach to relationships? So, my question is, what is natural? 89 Abraham: There are enough natural forces at work to assure the sustaining of the human species: enough variation, enough diversity, enough balance. In the same way that your natural impulses to satisfy hunger and thirst assure your survival, your sexual impulses and mating impulses also assure your survival. 90 Our interest in the subject of human relationships is not because you need to adjust your behavior to ensure your survival, because the survival of your species is not in jeopardy. Our interest in human relationships is about your survival in joy. 91 We have the benefit of being in full view of the Vibrational Escrows you have created from the contrasting experiences and relationships that you have lived, and it is our desire to help you find a way of achieving your own Vibrational alignment with those expanded creations so that you can live them, fully and joyously, now. 92 When something that you have lived has caused you to ask for an improved aspect, you must allow yourself the fullness of that desire or your joy is diminished. In simple terms, you have to keep up with what life has caused you to become or you cannot feel joy. 93 These are the most correct, truthful, accurate, natural things that we know about you as you are expressing through your physical form: • You are extensions of Source Energy. • You are physically focused for the purpose of experiencing contrast. • You are choosing to experience contrast for the purpose of new ideas and decisions about life. • Those new ideas and decisions about life equal the expansion of the Universe. 94 • The expansion of the Universe is the inevitable consequence of life. • When your physical life causes the Non-Physical part of you to expand, you must go with the expansion if you are to experience joy. • Joy is the most natural tenet of that which you and we are. • Relationships are the basis of your contrast. 95 • Therefore, relationships are the basis of all expansion. • Therefore, relationships are the basis of your joy. • If you do not find the thoughts that allow the joy, you are holding yourself back from who-you-have-become. • Your relationships are your reason for your expansion. 96 • Your relationships are often your reason for disallowing your expansion. • It is natural to be in a state of joy. • It is natural to be in a state of growth. • It is natural to be in a state of freedom. • These are the most important things for you to understand about relationships. 100 @What Is Natural for Mating Humans? Jerry: But which is more natural, having one mate or several? Should men have more than one wife at a time, or should women have more than one husband at a time? Even today, our cultures disagree about these things. Abraham: Your question points directly at another very large, very flawed premise: Flawed Premise #13: There are right ways and wrong ways to live. And all people should discover and agree on what the right way of living is, and then that right way should be enforced. 101 This flawed belief that there is only one right decision about any topic is at the heart of tremendous discord and upheaval. It is fortunate that you have no way of enforcing this flawed concept, for if you could, it would surely lead to the end of Beingness. In other words, since all expansion is born from the new intentions and ideas that are born from the contrast—elimination of the contrast would stop the expansion. 102 Do not worry, for that will never be the case, for the perfect balance of diversity has been very well established and flows with the Laws of the Universe. We are not discussing these things with you to preserve mankind or Eternity, because none of that is in jeopardy. We do discuss it with you, however, because your joyful survival is predicated upon your understanding of these things. 103 When your life causes you to radiate a request into your Vibrational Escrow, your Emotional Guidance System will help you find Vibrational alignment with it. And finding that alignment is necessary to your joyful fulfillment and expansion. And no laws that are apart from that have any bearing on you. 104 The majority of the laws that surround you, both religious and secular, were written by those not in alignment with the Broader Perspective of Source. Your laws are usually written from the perspective of what is not wanted. And so, many people spend a tremendous amount of time in argument about which laws are right and which laws are wrong, and, in doing so, hold themselves apart from their expanded perspectives. And then they use the negative emotion that they feel (which exists because of their separation from Source) as their justification for their arguments. 105 When you no longer seek the final word on the rightness of your behaviors and instead seek alignment with the Source within you by finding thoughts, words, and deeds that fill you with love while you participate, you will understand that it is possible to live upon this planet with large numbers of other Beings—who believe and behave in a variety of ways—in peace. 106 When you are able to focus in such a way as to allow your alignment with Source, even though others are choosing to behave differently than you are choosing, then you will truly be free from the bondage of attempting the impossible task of getting everyone to agree on one right way. One right way would lead to endedness. Many right ways allow Eternal expansion. 107 The reason why people believe that they need laws to control others around them is that they believe that the behavior of others can negatively impact them. But when you come to understand that nothing can come into your experience unless you invite it through thought, then you understand that you can release the impossible task of trying to control the behavior of others and replace it with the much simpler task of controlling the direction of your own thoughts. 108 We have come to remind you about the Art of Allowing: the Art of Allowing your Vibrational alignment with all that you have come to be and to desire. There is enough room in this very large, very diverse physical world for all that you are wanting. And every awful or abhorrent thing that you see exists only because someone is disallowing the Well-Being that would be there otherwise. 109 The Law of Attraction is the Law that manages all things that are Vibrational. (And all things are Vibration.) You do not have to work at that Law—it just is. If you will put your attention toward understanding and applying the Art of Allowing, you will live in joy regardless of what others are doing. Just remember, during the time you are giving your attention to those who are not joyful, you are not practicing the Art of Allowing.

110 @Will Feeling Good Always Attract Good-Feelers? Questioner: Is it a good idea for me to look for a mate who makes me feel good about myself? Abraham: Of course. When others hold you as their object of attention and feel appreciation at the same time, it would feel very good to you, because they are in alignment with their own Source and are flooding that aligned Energy in your direction. That always feels good to both the flower of the appreciation and the recipient of the appreciation. But do not let your feeling good be dependent upon someone’s positive attention shining on you. 111 Show yourself that you can connect to the Non-Physical Stream whether you are being held in someone’s positive flow or not. You have your own Connection, and when you practice it often, you will always be able to maintain your balance; whereas, if you wait for another to be in alignment and focused upon you, then your good feeling is dependent upon what someone else does, and that person may not always be in alignment, or you may not always be his or her only point of focus. 112 The reason why most relationships are much better feeling when they are new is because in the beginning, both partners are more inclined to look for the positive aspects in one another. Since your relationship is new, you are not yet aware of one another’s flaws, but as time goes on, it is common to begin seeing more flaws and to be making less effort to be optimistic in your expectation. 113 When you are dependent upon no other for your Connection to Source, you will discover true freedom—freedom from the only thing that can ever bind you: resistance to who-you-really-are. 114 @Couldn’t Anyone Become My Perfect Mate? Jerry: If there were only two people on the earth, no matter who that other person was, couldn’t we create out of that what we want? Couldn’t we find within that one person, the perfect mate? 115 Abraham: First you must understand that if there were only two people on the earth, the experiences of contrast that you would have lived would be so limited that your desires would not be very evolved. However, under those limited conditions, your desire would also be limited, and so you would very likely be rather happy with that limited Being. 116 But that is not the point you are getting at with your implausible hypothesis. Your point is, “If there is that which is wanted and that which is unwanted in every particle of the Universe, then can I not find wanted in all things? And if I focus upon wanted, won’t the Law of Attraction bring me more wanted?” And the answer to that is yes. 117 Looking for positive aspects wherever you are always leads to an improved future. So even if you were enduring a mostly terrible relationship, out of that contrast would be born desires for improvement, which the Source within you would be holding as the object of its undivided attention. 118 By deliberately focusing upon any small positive aspect you can find, you would then allow your alignment with the greater desires that had been born out of the contrast. And a consistent offering of that positive Vibration would deliver to you the physically manifested version. And, if (in your extreme hypothesis) there were only one other person on the planet, that desire would then have to be satisfied from that one person. Fortunately, you have a much larger, more cooperative playing field to draw from. 119 Questioner: When asked about what a perfect mate would be, someone whom I consider to be very wise said, “A perfect mate is someone who brings out the best in you, and also brings out the worst in you.” What do you think about that? 120 Abraham: This person would be a bit like the contrasting world in general. In other words, whenever you know what you do not want, you always know more clearly what you do want. So he definitely would be helping you with the Step One part of the equation: the asking. Your success at making this a successful, and therefore happy, relationship would depend upon your ability to then focus upon the desire that this rascal helped you to launch. 121 If your mate is evoking a steady stream of I know what I don’t want awareness, and so you are launching steady rockets of desire about what you do want—and if you are then able to focus predominantly on what you do want—then, in your aligned state, your power of influence would be strong, and he would stop the negative prodding. But if his negative prodding was strong enough to stand in the face of your continuing Allowing state, then he could not remain in your experience. The Law of Attraction would put you in different places. ✅ Part 2:- Psychology of Mating 101 completed

1 @The Topics Are Sex, Sexuality, and Sensuality Jerry: Sex, or sexuality, seems to be a sensitive topic in that it evokes guardedness and strong opinions from many who contemplate it. My first experience with anything remotely related to sexuality turned out very badly when a little girl and I were playing in a wooden box when we were about two years old. We got caught with our panties off, and we were both severely punished. 2 Also, as a child, I remember hearing my mother arguing with my father about sex. She told him that she had her three children, she was not interested in having sex with him, and he should find some other woman if it was important to him. Then later, I remember, as still very young children, the little boys and girls I knew and I were all having different sorts of sexual experiences with one another, but by the time I reached the age of actual sexual maturity, I guess because of the powerful stigma around the topic of sex, my concerns and fears and inhibitions were so strong that I would do just about anything to avoid the topic. 3 It was a long time, for me, before my sexual barriers went down or were resolved and I was able to move into happy sexual experiences. I would like to hear your perspective about the sexual aspects of physical human Beings to, perhaps, clarify the subject and leave people feeling better about it. 4 Abraham: As children, you are often met with adults who have lost Connection with their own sense of value, of Well-Being, and of worthiness; and from that lackful, disconnected state, they pass their guardedness on to you. 5 Over time, humans evaluate the subject of sexuality endlessly, passing new laws; amending old laws; struggling futilely to come to agreement with others about the correct attitude and approach to the subject and, even more futilely, to enforce the laws they create from their lackful positions. 6 Your rules or laws about sexuality diverge from culture to culture, generation to generation, society to society, and religion to religion, but in nearly every case, your laws about this and every other subject tend to hinge on the economic impact of the time. And, most important, your sexual laws and rules, like all laws and rules, are made by those who are out of alignment with their Broader Perspective. 7 If humans were to understand that you are all Vibrational Beings and that the Law of Attraction is bringing to each of you only what you are a Vibrational Match to, you would not be so concerned about the behavior of others, for you would not fear their behavior negatively impacting you. 8 But in your ignorance about how you do attract what comes, and in your fear that unwanted things will come, you make decisions and laws and rules that are not only impossible to enforce, but that foster even more of the behavior you seek to eliminate. It is always true that the harder you push against what you do not want—the more of what you do not want comes into your experience. 9 By far, the largest amount of pushing against the subject of sexuality comes from people of various religious groups who believe that God has spoken to humans and has given specific instructions regarding the topic. The inconsistency of the message man believes he has received accentuates the impossibility of receiving answers from the pure love of Source when the receiver is standing in a place of blame or guardedness. 10 The very idea that “what I have received is correct, and what you or others have received is wrong” holds you in the place of resistance to the very Source from which you claim to have received it. Which leads us to the most important flawed premise of all: 11 Flawed Premise #14: There is a God Who, having considered all things, has come to a final and correct conclusion about everything. This belief, or flawed premise, is at the root of man’s continual assault on humanity. It is at the basis of your wars, your prejudices, your hatred, and your feelings of unworthiness; and it is your primary reason for disallowing your own Well-Being. 12 This flawed premise is so important, and the ramifications of it are so immense, that we could write an entire book speaking only about man’s distorted view of himself, of others, and of that which he calls God. This inaccurate conclusion—that Source (no matter what name you want to give it) is no longer expanding but instead stands at a place of completion, or perfection, demanding your physical compliance with its narrow rules—not only defies the Laws of the Universe, but then requires another flawed premise, and then another and another, to try to prop it up. 13 From outside the Vibration of the love of his Source, man stands guarded and blameful and guilty and fearful, and then assigns those same lackful characteristics to that which he calls God. Humanity continues to argue about the laws passed down from God as it bends and twists them to suit individual economic desires or needs. 14 Often humans are informed by their religious leaders of the value, or necessity, of keeping these rules. You are told that the keeping of some rules will bring blessings, while the breaking of others will bring punishment; but when you notice that those who are breaking the laws seem to be thriving while those who strive to keep them most are often suffering greatly, you are told one of the greatest flawed premises of all: 15 Flawed Premise #15: You cannot know, while you are still in your physical body, the true reward or punishment for your physical actions. Your reward or punishment will be shown to you after your physical death. 16 The loving Laws that support All-That-Exists are Laws that are Universal and therefore always apply. And alignment with them is evident in every moment of alignment, just as misalignment with them is evident in every moment. What feels like love, is—and what feels like hate is not love. 17 There are many who want to live in the appropriate way, but sorting out proper behavior from the enormous lists of diversity leaves most people uncertain of the rightness of their path. Which leads to yet another flawed premise: 18 Flawed Premise #16: By gathering data about the manifestations or results of the way the people of the earth have lived and are living, we can effectively sort them into absolute piles of right and wrong. And once those determinations have been made, we then have only to enforce those conclusions. And once we get everyone to agree with our determinations—and, more important, once we get them to comply with them—we will then have harmony on Earth. 19 And so, more people die every day in the struggle to defend, or prove, which way of life is the correct way, with each group claiming to have the absolute approval and support of God. And, in not one bit of any of that is any true Connection to God. 20 You did not come into this physical body with the intention of taking all of the ideas that exist and whittling them down to a handful of agreed-upon ideas. In fact, that is the very opposite of your prebirth intention. Instead, you knew that you would be coming into an environment of extreme variety, and that from that platform of difference and choices would be born more new-and-improved ideas. 21 You understood that the Eternal nature of that which humans call God would be enhanced by your participation. You knew that this platform of enormous contrast would be the foundation of the Eternal expansion that exists within that which humans call Eternity. There is no ending to the expansion of God, and physical humans’ participation cannot be separated from that expansion. 22 The most destructive part of humans’ confusion about their Connection with God or Source is that in their need to find and defend their values, they must push against the values of others. And the very nature of focusing upon and pushing against unwanted aspects of others prevents their alignment with the very goodness and Source that they seek. And then they blame the differences in others for the emptiness they feel. Which leads us to another flawed premise: 23 Flawed Premise #17: Only very special people, like the founder of our group, can receive the right message from God. And all other messages from all other messengers are therefore incorrect. 24 It is interesting that in the midst of a conversation about sexuality, we would not only uncover one of the biggest flawed premises of all, but that the subject of sexuality is also the avenue through which the existence of humans hinges. A basic feeling of unworthiness, due to the lack of Connection with Source, is at the root of the confusion around the subject of sexuality. 25 It is a rare human who has found what he believes to be the appropriate way to behave, who has then also mustered the self-discipline to behave that way, because the natural instincts that are inspired from a much Broader knowing run counter to the restricted behavior assigned by human Beings. 26 @Are Our Sexual Laws Decreed by Non-Physical Dimensions? Jerry: So what is natural for me? I remember, as years went by, that I always wanted to understand not only what is natural, but what might go against the higher laws. For instance, as I observed or read about cultures around the world, it seemed like every one, no matter how primitive or how supposedly advanced, had taboos and rules— which controlled the newer people coming in—regarding sex. And so, I wondered if we bring any of that from our higher knowing or from our Inner Beings. 27 Abraham: No taboos or rules are coming from your Inner Being or from your higher knowing or from Non-Physical, but instead, they are the product of your physical vulnerability. Without exception, every law—religious or secular—comes from a perspective of lack, from a position of trying to protect or guard someone from something. 28 If you were really paying attention to what is happening regarding these laws, you would realize that the laws do not deter the lawbreakers. They only hinder those who would not break the laws anyway, restrict freedom, and add confusion to the lives of those who seek approval from others through conformity. 29 Can you hear the birds? [Abraham is commenting on sounds of nature that are audible from inside the house.] That is a very sexual call. A moment ago, the rooster was crowing so loudly that you considered not continuing with the recording. In other words, your world is filled with Beings who are all receiving direction from Non-Physical. 30 And yet, it is only the humans who are guarded and resistant regarding the subject of sexuality; it is only the humans who are coming from this extreme place of lack regarding the subject of sexuality. And, from your perspective of lack, from your concernthat you may be doing something wrong, from your concern that has been fostered within you from those who have gone before, you are, most of you, in a place of great confusion and not very much joy. 31 @Sexuality Is Guided by Impulses, Not Laws Jerry: Okay. So there are no rules from the Non-Physical dimension telling us how to behave sexually here in physical form, and so when we are born into our physical bodies, we didn’t come knowing any rules because we weren’t sent with them. Is that why children are so unguarded and behave in ways that adults see as too loose or too careless? And is that why adults then feel a need to rein them in or control them? 32 Abraham: You were not born into your physical body holding the memory of lists of right and wrong because those lists do not exist, but you were born with an effective Guidance System. The emotions that you feel, without exception, are indicators of the Vibrational alignment—or variance—between the thought your human brain is focused upon and the perspective of your Broader Non-Physical Perspective regarding the same subject. 33 Since the Source within you is Eternally expanding, your understanding, perspective, intentions, and the knowledge of that part of you is Eternally expanding as well. That is the reason there cannot be a static list of right and wrong or good and evil for you to measure your experience against. 34 Instead, you have personal, individual, loving, accurate feedback, thought by thought, moment by moment, to help you know when you are in alignment with that Broader Perspective or when you are not. There is not only one guidance list handed down from Source for all, but individual Guidance for all physical Beings, in all points in time and space, and regarding all situations. 35 If, in your desire to socialize the new arrivals into your society, you are unaware of your own Guidance System, and therefore unaware of theirs, then you embark upon the impossible task of determining which actions are the right actions. You also have the even more impossible task of enforcing those decisions. 36 The reason why so many people feel a need to control the behavior of others is because they believe that others have the power to assert themselves into their experience. When you remember that nothing can come into your experience without your Vibrational invitation of it, then you do the simple work of paying attention to your own Vibrational offering, and you save yourself the enormous and impossible task of controlling the behavior of others. 37 When you remember that the varied behavior of others adds to the balance and the Well-Being of your planet even if they offer behavior that you do not approve of; and that you do not have to participate in the unwanted behavior, and will not—unless you give your attention to it—you become more willing to allow others to live as they choose. 38 The need to control others always stems from a basic misunderstanding of the Laws of the Universe and of the role that you have intended to play with others with whom you share your planet. But there is another very big flawed premise that arises here: 39 Flawed Premise #18: By ferreting out the undesirable elements in our society, we can eliminate them. And in their absence, we will be freer. True freedom is the absence of resistance; true freedom is the presence of alignment—true freedom is the way you feel when you are no longer disallowing your complete alignment, or blending, with the Broader Non-Physical part of you. 40 Therefore, it is not possible to be in the act of pushing against something unwanted and be blended with who-you-really-are and what you want at the same time. You cannot be in the state of pushing against what you do not want and be in harmony with what you do want at the same time. And so, you will never get to a better-feeling state by trying to control others, no matter how well-meaning you believe your motives to be. 41 You did not come knowing rules of correct behavior, but you certainly came feeling impulses. In other words, just as you have the impulse to drink when you are thirsty in order to keep your body replenished or to eat when you are hungry to keep your body fueled, so the sensation, or the urging, of sexuality comes forth naturally for the perpetuation of the species upon your planet.

42 @What If Humans Behaved, Sexually, Like the Wild Animals? Jerry: So, getting back to the animals, who do seem to behave from their Non-Physical Guidance or instinct, as we have come to call it . . . our rooster and his hens have no written laws, or rules, that they are conforming to; it’s just what comes from within them. And so, if we could be born into this planet and start fresh like that, without rules, it seems like we, too, should be able to operate from our Inner Being without the need of outside restrictions. But, instead, we are born into societies and cultures that already have rules and controls that they insist we conform to. 43 Abraham: What we most want you to understand is that, as humans, you, too, do have Guidance that is coming forth from within. And your Guidance, your innate knowing, your sense of self—indeed, the Eternal nature of who-you-are—is what is dominant within you. And while you do believe that you are hindered by the controls set forth by other humans, we want you to know that this control is not as large or as hindering as you believe, because your innate Non-Physical impulses are even stronger. 44 Even though your societies have imposed endless rules or laws regarding your sexual behavior, many more of you break those rules—and always have broken those rules—than keep them. That is because your Non-Physical impulses are so strong. If your government, or some controlling agency, were to tell you that you were no longer allowed to eat food—your natural impulses of survival would prevail, and you would find a way to eat. 45 You and your world do not need this book in order to free your behavior from the binding laws and rules and misunderstandings about sexuality, because your natural impulses are so strong that you really are not behaving as if you feel bound by them. In other words, your natural instincts and impulses are so strong that they do lead your behavior. But then you suffer emotional discord as you then measure your behavior against those unrealistic rules that have been created from your place of attempting to control behaviors. In other words, you behave naturally, but then you feel bad about it. 46 Your societies will never find the happiness they seek—or know the deliciousness of true freedom—as long as they believe in controlling the behavior of one another. It is the control of your thought, and the alignment with your Broader Perspective, that you are really seeking. 47 @What about When Society Disapproves of Sexual Individuality? Jerry: So what if you feel good when you think about a specific action, but when you consider what others think about your action, you don’t feel good? Then what would you suggest? 48 Abraham: We would say that now you are off track because you are attempting to guide your actions by the opinions of others outside of you, when the only guidance that counts is the Guidance that you feel as your thought, in the moment, harmonizes—or does not harmonize—with the Broader Perspective of your Source. 49 No other human really knows the intentions you held as you came forth from Non-Physical. They have not walked in your shoes through the thousands of interactions you have experienced, and they were not a part of the rockets of desire that you have launched as you have lived your life. They are not privy to the Vibrational Reality that you have created through the living of life, and they cannot feel the harmony or discord—the allowing or resisting— that you feel through your own emotions. 50 Your question is an important one because through it you are trying to understand which of your emotions to trust or follow: the good-feeling emotion that came in response to your personal thoughts about your personal experience, or the bad-feeling emotion that came in response to your awareness of the disapproval of another. 51 Nothing could be more important than coming to recognize the existence of your Emotional Guidance System and how it works, for without it you have no consistent guidance. The emotions you feel, in any moment, are pointing out to you the agreement or disagreement between you and your Source regarding the thought that is active in you at the moment of the emotion. 52 If you can understand that through life, before you entered this body and since, your Inner Being has become the Vibrational summation of all that you have lived and now stands as the Vibrational equivalent to all that is good—and if you can then understand that your emotions are giving you feedback about how your current thought blends with that all-knowing, Pure, Positive Energy viewpoint of Source— then and only then can you fully appreciate your emotions. 53 So when you feel negative emotion, it always means that your currently active thought is out of alignment with the knowledge of Source. In other words, when you find fault with yourself, when you decide that you are inappropriate or unworthy, you will always feel negative emotion—because the Source within you only feels love toward you. 54 When you disapprove of others, you will always feel negative emotion—because the Source within you only loves others. If you will remember that whenever you feel negative emotion, it always means you are in disagreement with Source, then you can deliberately reframe your thoughts until you come into alignment. That is the way to effectively utilize your Guidance System. 55 When people replace this very personal Guidance by attempting to modify their behavior to please other people, they very soon discover the inconsistency of that guidance and soon find themselves confused about what to do. 56 Many people have lost conscious Connection with their own Guidance Systems, and so instead of deliberately focusing their thoughts into harmony and alignment with their Source and their power—instead of making sure that they are steadily tuned to the Vibration of their clarity and love and power— they turn their attention to the results of what they and the people around them have been thinking. 57 In other words, they examine and catalog and pigeonhole and evaluate and judge the results of the Vibrational creating that is happening around them, putting those results into categories of good and bad, right and wrong. And in all of that data, they lose their way. 58 There are so many differing opinions and so many extenuating circumstances and so many motives that make it impossible to sort out the rightness or wrongness of interpersonal behavior in your societies. And even when you come to, more or less, general consensus of what you agree upon as a society as the appropriate ways to live, you have no way of convincing all others of the rightness of your opinion. 59 And even when you come together and pronounce laws against “inappropriate” behavior, you have no way of enforcing those laws. . . . While your societies continue to try to dictate and enforce human behavior to please the majority—because of your diversity, it continues to be an uncomfortable struggle that, again and again, falls of its economic weight. There simply is not enough money in the world to buck the natural currents of individual freedom and independence of thought. 60 When people have forgotten that this is an inclusion-based Universe, and that the Law of Attraction is the manager who is arranging every detail of every rendezvous that occurs, they fear something that can never be: they fear that unwanted things can assert themselves into their experience. But when you remember that nothing uninvited ever comes into your experience, and that every invitation of both wanted and unwanted comes because you have given considerable thought to the essence of it, then you can begin to utilize your own powerful Emotional Guidance System with the assurance that you do create your own reality. 61 If people would simply pay attention to the harmony or disharmony within themselves—which is offered to them in the form of positive or negative emotion—they would be able to eliminate the arduous and impossible task of trying to control the behavior of others. 62 By deliberately focusing your thoughts in the direction of your Broader understanding, and no longer wasting time and money on things you cannot control, you will not only come into alignment with Source and feel the relief of that in your emotions—but all things wanted can then come to you. 63 So getting back to your powerful question . . . your thought about a behavior or action that brought you pleasure—regardless of the opinions of others who stand upon their endless opinions and rules and disapproving platforms—is a thought that the Source within you agrees with. And your thought of your own inappropriateness that made you feel bad, because of your assumed disapproval of others (whether real or imagined) is a thought that the Source within you does not agree with. 64 To sort out all of the behaviors of your societies, past and present; to sort out all of the opinions of people around your world; to review all of the laws; to understand how the laws came about; to evaluate the evolution of the laws; to try to live up to all of them, or enforce them . . . is confusing and overwhelming and impossible. 65 To know if Source, Infinite Intelligence, Inner Being, God agrees or disagrees with the thought, word, or action you are involved in—you have only to notice if it feels good or bad. To find your peace regarding anything, it is necessary for you to set aside your desire to find approval from others and to seek approval from self. 66 And you do that by starting from the inside out—by acknowledging that you want to feel good, and that you want to have a life experience that is in harmony with what is good. And if you start there, it is our absolute promise to you that you will never find yourself in a situation where the action that you are experiencing, or even contemplating, will put you in a position of feeling that you have betrayed your greater sense of right and wrong. 67 @Who Gets to Set Humans’ Sexual Hierarchy? Jerry: It seems to me, as I have evaluated sexuality within our culture, that we have what might be called the high priest, who doesn’t engage in sex; then there are the common folks, who do engage in sex (but only for the purpose of creating children); and then, on the lower end of the hierarchy, there would be those who would engage in sex for pleasure. But it seems to me that we all have some of all of that— 68 Abraham: We have to interrupt you here because all of those ideas come from a perspective of lack, from humans believing in their unworthiness. Your physical life experience is a life of sensuality. You come forth into this physical realm with the sensual eyes with which to see, the sensual ears with which to hear, the sensual nose with which to smell, the sensual skin with which to feel, and the sensual tongue with which to taste. 69 This Leading Edge time-space reality is about the intricate Vibrational interpretations that your physical senses provide, and all of that is for the enhancement of your physical experience. 70 If you will pay attention to your emotions, they will help you find the appropriateness of your behavior, and you will come to understand the worthiness that is at the core of you. It is not necessary, or even possible, to pinpoint the turning point when humans stopped believing in their value and worthiness. 71 It has been a gradual erosion caused by the disallowance of Connection with Source because of the comparison of human experience in search of the one “right” answer or the one “right” behavior. And now, a feeling of unworthiness runs rampant on your planet, and much of human thought is directed toward lack, which only promotes more disallowance of alignment with Source and with love and with Well-Being. 72 You are here in your physical bodies as extensions of Source Energy, experiencing specific contrast and coming to specific new decisions about the goodness of life, and every time your experience poses a question to you—an equivalent answer is born in the experience of Source. 73 Every time your experience poses a problem to you—an equivalent solution is born in the experience of Source. And so, because of your willingness to live and explore and experience contrast, you are giving birth to constant new rockets of desire—and All-That-Is expands because of what you are living. 74 When it becomes your dominant intention to find good-feeling thoughts, then you become one who is most often a Vibrational Match to the Source within you, and the good feeling that will then be usually present within you is your indication that you are fulfilling your reason for being and that you are continuing to keep up with the expansion of your own Being. 75 Every experience causes you to expand, and your positive emotion is your indication that you are keeping up with that new expansion. Negative emotion is your indication that the greater part of you has moved to an expanded place—but you are holding back. 76 And so, by paying attention to the way you feel, and by continually reaching for the best-feeling thoughts you can find, you will establish a rhythm of alignment that will help you immediately realize when you are straying from the goodness that you have become. 77 It is our absolute promise to you that you will never be able to take action that is contrary to the joyful, loving, God-Source Being within you without feeling very strong negative emotion. . . . There are many people who are completely out of alignment with the Source within them, who stand in condemnation of others while asserting their claim on righteousness. 78 But the anger that burns within them is evidence of their disallowance of the very rightness they are making claim to. Anger and hatred and condemnation are not symbols of alignment with God—but indicators of misalignment with that which you call God. 79 Some would say, “Then the feeling of guilt that I have must mean that I am doing something evil or wrong.” But we want you to understand that your negative emotion simply means that the thought that is vibrating within you does not match the Vibration of your Source. Source continues to love you. When you do not love you, you feel the discord. 80 If we were standing in your physical shoes and we were contemplating an action that caused negative emotion, we would not proceed with the action until we had resolved the negative emotion. We would make sure that we had come into alignment with Source before proceeding. 81 By feeling for the improved thought, in time, and usually in a short time, you will feel the harmony of your Source; and you will know the appropriateness of your behavior. We would not look for the long lists of right and wrong, but instead, we would feel for the emotion of alignment with Source. 82 Negative emotion does not mean that you are not good. It means that your currently active thought does not harmonize with the currently active thoughts of Source on the same subject. If you have come to believe that sexual interaction is wrong and you are about to engage in sexual interaction, your negative emotion is not confirming that sexual interaction is wrong. 83 It is confirming that your opinion of your behavior and of yourself in this moment does not harmonize with how Source feels about you. Stop and reach for loving, approving thoughts about yourself and feel the discord disappear. 84 Usually, by the time you have spent 50 or 60 or 70 years in your body, you come to the very clear awareness that you cannot please them all. In fact, you usually understand that you cannot please very many of them, because each of them wants something different from you. 85 Attempting to guide yourself through the approval of others is futile and painful. But you may trust your inner Guidance. In fact, it is really the only thing that you can trust, because it holds the complete understanding of who-you-really-are, who-you-have-become, and where you stand in Vibrational relationship with that expanded Being. 86 When you understand your relationship with the Source within you and you are aware of your own Emotional Guidance System— which continually indicates your Vibrational relationship with Source—it will not be possible for you to stray from the wholeness and goodness and the worthiness that is you.