Healthy Muslim Families: Some articles

Talking to children and youth about sensitive topics such as appropriate code of conduct between men and women as well as substance use/abuse are conversations that parents and caregivers, despite religious affiliations, struggle to have. Assuming that Muslim children and youth will not engage with drugs and alcohol because they have heard on numerous occasions that such behaviour is impermissible in Islam, is not enough to discourage them from unhealthy habits. Substantial evidence needs to be presented to youth to provide them with a holistic understanding of why engaging with alcohol and drugs is not permissible in Islam. Peer pressure and effective childcare Rationalizing the Islamic prohibition against harmful substances is imperative to prevent children and youth from making incorrect choices when enticed to engage with alcohol and/or drugs while socializing with peers. In fact, effective childcaring results in possessing the confidence that one’s child will make sound choices in the event of peer pressure because the child has confidently internalized the purpose of abstaining from harmful substances. Although substances do not always have the same impact on everyone is also important to be open and honest about the various effects. Just because a peer experienced euphoria while under the influence, does not mean that everyone experimenting with that substance will also feel the same. Additionally, Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) also paid attention to the importance of keeping good company. The Prophet (PBUH) said: “A man follows the religion of his close friend; so, each one should consider whom he makes his close friend” (Khokhtar, 2021). Hence, being familiar with the individuals that one’s child associates with are crucial in limiting negative influences. Being able to provide advice to children and youth about their peers and having that input positively received, requires a welcoming and loving home environment that is not solely based on strict discipline. To prepare parents and caregivers to have uncomfortable yet fundamental conversations with their children, a list of resources has been put together to inform them about the appropriate approach to take while attempting to empower their child to make healthy life choices. As an educator, I have had the opportunity to engage in lengthy conversations with Muslim and non-Muslim youth, and it was brought to my attention that organized gatherings between teenagers, often include alcohol and, in many cases, even drugs far more addictive than cannabis. While schools take responsibility in educating children and youth about the detrimental impact of substance use/abuse, exploring the Islamic prohibition of such behaviour alongside parents, further empowers Muslims from abstaining. Alcohol and drug prohibition in Islamic discourse There are several reasons why alcohol and drugs are discouraged/impermissible in Islamic discourse. The most evident reason lies behind the immediate effects of such substances. According to Drug-Free Kids Canada, the short-term impact of alcohol use includes but is not limited to doubled or blurred vision, nausea and vomiting, impaired memory or loss of memory, flushed skin, and aggressive and violent behaviour. Alcohol intoxication could also lead to respiratory arrest (stops or troubles with breathing), stupor (unresponsiveness), coma, and even death. Long-term effects and risks of alcohol consumption could also result in diverse forms of cancer (liver, throat, stomach etc.), high blood pressure, damaged organs (heart, liver, brain, and stomach), decline of mental health, trouble sleeping, and hormonal irregularities. Drugs, much like alcohol, have destructive outcomes to children and youth’s overall wellbeing. In fact, experimenting at a young age with substances could lead to a dependency pattern that could have worse outcomes in one’s adult life. It is also essential for parents and caregivers to remember that it is natural for children and youth to be curious about drugs. Hence, being able to provide them with resources and answers to their questions is fundamental for early prevention. Fostering a home environment where children can confide in a trusting and loving adult to ask questions without fear of punishment is not only encouraged but expected within the Islamic framework of childcare (see the prophetic example as well as other parental figures in Islam like Maryam). Finally, it is important to highlight that substance abuse leads one to concern themselves with earthly pleasures instead of an emphasis on spiritual enlightenment and connection to Allah (SWT). Hence, when alcohol prohibition initially emerged, Muslims were primarily discouraged from praying while intoxicating (see Quran 2:219, 4:43, 5:90, 16:67). However, once the community was further fortified with belief in Allah (SWT), alcohol use/abuse was prohibited altogether. Indeed, Allah (SWT) in the Quran says: “O believers! Intoxicants, gambling, idols, and drawing lots for decisions are all evil of Satan’s handiwork. So, shun them so you may be successful” (Quran 5:90) Overcoming addiction as a family Despite how invested parents and caregivers are in motivating their children to make healthy and positive life choices, unfortunately, addiction to harmful substances is not uncommon. In fact, upon facing a situation where a loved one is struggling with alcohol or substance addiction, it is essential to mobilize in order to assist them in recovering. The following recommended steps are meant to help families move past the initial shock and get into action. Step #1: Learn about your loved one’s addiction Before approaching your loved one, it is essential to be confident that they are dealing with addiction to harmful substances. Observing their behaviour and eventually verifying your suspicion with scientific evidence could better inform your approach. Step #2: Consider your approach Instead of reacting to the news, it is best to reflect on how you express your concerns eloquently—emphasizing how their health would deteriorate rather than addressing the social impact of their actions on themselves and the family as a unit. Step #3: Choose the right place and time Muslims tend to have, for the most part, a close bond with extended family but, addressing something this private and sensitive should be taking place in a safe and intimate environment where your loved one will not feel threatened and exposed. Although you might foster a loving and confidential space for your loved one to address their struggles, try not to get defensive if they refuse to engage in a conversation with you. Consider being patient and if you realize that this is beyond your control, reach out to a mental health professional to assist you in staging an intervention. Step #4: Listen with compassion According to The Recovery Village, substance abuse usually foretells poor mental health such as anxiety and depression. Self-medicating with alcohol or drugs is not unusual, and therefore, it is more appropriate to use compassionate language when discussing your concerns rather than undertaking an accusatory approach. Step #5: Offer your support Although you might be able to offer only so little, providing your loved one with the opportunity to reach out to you when they feel ready while also making them feel safe, heard, and considered when they confine to you about their addictions could be just enough. Recognizing one’s limitations is essential. Seek out additional resources and support instead of taking upon the challenge of walking your loved one to recovery. Step #6: Together, develop an action plan Alongside your loved one, work together on developing an action plan to address their needs. Listen to their concerns and offer to assist them in their journey towards recovery. Working with a mental health worker who is an expert in substance abuse could also be beneficial for all parties involved. Overall, fostering honest conversations with children and youth about the dangers of alcohol and substance use/abuse is vital. Offering additional resources to validate diverse approaches to substance prohibition could positively impact youth to make more sound choices in their lives. Using aggression or coercion with minors who inquire about alcohol and drug prohibition in Islam can further push children away because it does not create a safe conversation space. Additionally, oversimplified counterarguments that merely state “substances are haram” are not compelling arguments and do not discourage Muslim children and youth from experimenting. It is important as parents and caregivers of Muslim children and youth to remember that even upon the possibility of engaging with impermissible actions in Islam, forgiveness and gentleness go a long way. Indeed, “During the lifetime of the Prophet (PBUH), there was a man called Abd Allah whose nickname was Donkey, and he used to make Allah’s Messenger (PBUH) laugh. The Prophet (PBUH) lashed him because of drinking [alcohol]. And one day, he was brought to the Prophet (PBUH) on the same charge and was lashed [again]. On that, a man among the people said: O Allah (SWT), curse him! How frequently he has been brought [to the Prophet (PBUH) on this charge]! The Prophet (PBUH) said: Do not curse him, for by Allah (SWT), I know he loves Allah (SWT) and His Apostle (PBUH)” (Khokhtar, 2021).

How do you wake up in the morning? Do you jump out of bed and look forward to starting the day? Do you wake up in the morning and you did not want to get out of bed, hear the alarm clock ring and you press the snooze button over and over again until you are forced to get up and go to the bathroom? Or wake up even more tired than when you went to sleep? What do you think about when you wake up? Do you think about all the things you need to do, the list is endless and you feel overwhelmed before you get out of bed or you wake up in the morning, thinking about all the challenges that you are facing in your life, think about all the criticism that people have given you, even the areas where you have not succeeded. Then you feel discouraged and unmotivated or think about what is missing in your life; not enough money, no big title (Director or CEO) after your name or that you do not have a flashy car and so on. When faced with a problem what do you do? Spend time discussing and analyzing the problem in great depth and then defining it in unsolvable terms? Or do you find out who is to blame? Tips: How to control the FOCUS of your thoughts When faced with a challenge or a problem, spend 5% of your time discussing the problem, 95% of your time finding innovative and creative solutions. Remember “The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude to the problem”. Ensure that you do the following on a daily basis: Learn something new on a daily basis. Learning does not end when you obtain your degree or leave university. The journey of life is a learning process. Successful people convert their failures into stepping stones by learning from them and moving on. When you try something and it does not work out, do not despair, all you have to do is find a better way to do it. Enjoy – Ensure that on a daily basis you are able to enjoy and have fun. You have the ability to create memorable moments on a daily basis. Remember “life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but how many moments that take our breath away” Appreciate – As soon as we develop a sense of appreciation (gratitude), we are shifting our focus of thoughts on what we have and what we have been able to achieve. Reflect on your life. “An unexamined life is not worth living” – Socrates. Reflection allows for self-assessment, checking that you are on the right track. Reflection gives you time to monitor your thoughts and actions, to check whether they are in alignment with your purpose in life. Negative thoughts have a way of coming when you least expect them to. People spend too much time thinking about what happened to them in the past or the possibility of negative things happening to them in the future. To get rid of these negative thoughts ask yourself one QUESTION “If this was my LAST day alive, what would I love to do..” then go and do it. Do not postpone living.

With our increasingly busy lifestyles, it becomes even harder to find time to exercise and stay healthy. Here are some of the best ways to do so while working long hours: Wake up a little earlier It would surprise you but the earlier you wake up, the more energetic you will feel. Set your alarm an hour or so before you usually would and get some exercise in. This can be in the form of some yoga, gym time or taking a quick job in your neighbourhood. Get moving at lunch-time Use your time wisely and above all else, get out of your seat! Take a few moments to walk to the local store for lunch, or take a walk in the area. Enjoy the fact that you don’t need to be chained to your desk. Prepare your meals ahead of time So if you’ve only got fast-food places around your work, prepare yourself a good lunch at home ahead of your busy day. Focus on eating the right things and avoiding processed foods but cooking yourself and ensuring the quality of your food is that which your body deserves. Take a break for prayers This one will depend on your work dynamics but utilise prayer timings to get out of your seat and to move your body, and what finer way to do so than in prayer? Drink water! Yes, we say this non-stop but there is nothing better than actually drinking some water. Ditch your fizzy drinks, and avoid drinks with high sugar content., and replace it with some water. You will feel better and even see a notable difference in your skin! Set reminders and count your steps I speak for myself on this one, but nothing is as motivating as seeing your step count hit the thousands. Invest in a cheap watch or something of the sort that will constantly remind you to get moving and to motivate yourself with your step count.

Many people often ask, “How do I know when to help?” Some signs that a friend or family member may have a mental illness and could need your help are: They suddenly no longer have interest in things they used to enjoy. They seem angry or sad for little or no reason. They don’t seem to enjoy anything anymore. They have told you about or seem to be hearing voices or having unsettling thoughts. They seem emotionally numb like they don’t feel anything anymore. They eat a lot more or less than they used to. Their sleep patterns have changed. They seem to be anxious or terrified about situations or objects in life that seem normal to you and to others. They’ve been missing more and more time from work or school. They’ve been drinking heavily and/or using drugs to cope. They are avoiding their close friends and family members. They are talking about taking their life or feeling hopeless Support from family and friends is a key part of helping someone who is living with mental illness. This support provides a network of practical and emotional help. This is also where Healthy Muslim Families can help. We are a network made up of parents, children, siblings, spouses or partners, extended families, close friends, coworkers, coaches, teachers, and religious leaders passionate to positively help people in need. Caring for anyone living with an illness can be challenging. In order to best do so, here are a few tips to help you support someone living with mental illness. 1. Learn about the illness and its signs and symptoms. Also, learn more about how treatments work so that you know what side effects and improvements you may see. 2. Encourage treatment. Offer to help make those first appointments with a doctor to find out what’s wrong or accompany the person to the doctor-these first steps can be hard. If you do accompany the person, write down any notes or questions either of you have in advance so that you cover all the major points. 3. Help set specific goals that are realistic and can be approached one step at a time. 4. Don’t assume you know what the person needs. Ask how you can help. Listen carefully to the response. 5. Provide emotional support. You can play an important role in helping someone who’s not feeling well feel less alone and ashamed. They are not to blame for their illness, but they may feel that they are. Help encourage hope. Although ultimate responsibility lies with the person living with the illness, you can play an active role in your friend or loved one’s treatment. Now more than ever, it is important to reduce stigma and encourage people not to suffer in silence, but to seek help. Always remember that with help, there is hope.

Have you ever tried to fix an ongoing lack of energy by getting more sleep — only to do so and still feel exhausted? If you’ve ever told someone you’re tired all the time, they’ve probably told you that you need to get more sleep or improve your sleep hygiene. Here’s a secret: sleep and rest are not the same things, despite the fact that many of us confuse the two. What are the seven different types of rest? Getting enough rest is essential if you want to be happy, healthy, and productive. Here are the various types of rest you require to feel your best: Physical: Physical rest refers to the act of resting your body. Physical rest can include anything that restores your body, such as getting a massage or attending a yoga class, in addition to sleep. Physical rest refers to the act of resting your body. Physical rest can include anything that restores your body, such as getting a massage or attending a yoga class, in addition to sleep. Mental: Mental rest means giving your brain a break. When people are overwhelmed and find it difficult to switch off their thoughts, they require mental rest. Emotional: Emotional rest is about being authentic and honest with yourself about your feelings. When people become actively engaged in people-pleasing activities, they need emotional rest (saying yes to a commitment, even though they want to say no). Social: Social rest entails pursuing positive, energizing, and supportive social connections, as well as taking a break from socialization entirely. People frequently require social rest when their relationships drain and exhaust them. Sensory: Sensory rest refers to giving your senses a break. People require sensory rest when their senses are overwhelmed by constant stimuli, such as spending the entire day glued to computers, phone, and TV screens. Creative: Creative rest is about exposing yourself to artistic, nature-based, and innovative environments, without feeling the need to produce a creation—and feeling the sense of inspiration that comes along with them. People need creative rest when they feel stuck, uninspired, and unable to develop new ideas or solutions to problems. Spiritual: Spiritual rest is about connecting with something larger than yourself. People need spiritual rest when they find themselves so caught up in their issues that they can’t see or connect with the bigger picture. As you can see, sleep alone can’t restore us to the point we feel rested. So it’s time for us to begin focusing on getting the right type of rest we need. Paying attention to these rest deficits is a critical part of productivity. If you’re exhausted, you can’t do your best work—and if you’re not getting the right type of rest, you’re not going to be able to get past that exhaustion.

The Holy Quran will always be our source of inspiration, knowledge, and law as we strive to become better Muslims. Surprisingly, the Quran also provides both health benefits and knowledge on the numerous fruits and foods of the world that we can enjoy, suggesting that we can look to the Holy Quran for guidance on what types of fruits may be best for our health. While some fruits are mentioned as part of Allah’s gift to us on earth, others are known as the fruit of Heaven. Let’s take a look at the fruits mentioned in the Quran, and find out their benefits. 1. Olives Mentioned numerous times within the Quran, olives are enjoyed with all types of foods and desserts – and are most commonly grown in the region of the Middle East. Made into an oil, pickled, or garnishing, the olive is used in almost all parts of the world today. Olives possess a monounsaturated fat called oleic acid, which has been linked to preventing heart disease. It contains significant amounts of antioxidants which protect cell membranes against diseases like cancer. It helps to reduce inflammation throughout the body after eating them, which includes a reduction in pain and irritation in the joints, muscles, injuries, tendons. It is a great source of vitamin E, which is a major factor in protecting our skin. Olives are great protection against anaemia, as they are rich in iron and copper. “He causes to grow for you thereby the crops, olives, palm trees, grapevines, and from all the fruits. Indeed, that is a sign for people who give thought.” [Surah an-Nahl:11] 2. Grapes An ancient fruit, dating back around 8,000 years when it was first cultivated in what is now the broader region of the Middle East, grapes are both a popular and highly nutritious fruit. Light and white grape juice supplements the iron content in the body and prevents fatigue. Grapes increase the nitric oxide levels in the blood, which prevents blood clots. Ripe grape juice is an important home remedy for curing migraines. The plentiful amount of iron and sugar contained within each grape also fosters blood production and acts as a natural medicine for liver, kidney, and digestive system diseases. “Or you have a garden of palm trees and grapes and make rivers gush forth within them in force?” [Surah Israa:91] 3. Pomegranates A favourite fruit used in juices, syrups, and savory dishes, the pomegranate is a huge part of many Muslim cultures today. Appearing in the Quran three times, the pomegranate is often mentioned in relation to Heaven and Allah’s gift to humankind. Pomegranate peel, bark and leaves are used to calm disorders of the stomach or diarrhea caused by any kind of digestive problems. It contains high levels of antioxidants called flavonoids which are known to be effective in counteracting various cancer radials. Their juice, along with its antibacterial and antiviral properties, helps to reduce the effects of dental plaque and protects against various oral diseases. “And it is He who sends down rain from the sky and We produce thereby the growth of all things. We produce from it greenery from which We produce grains arranged in layers. And from the palm trees of its emerging fruit are clusters hanging low. And gardens of grapevines and olives and pomegranates, similar yet varied. Look at its fruit when it yields and its ripening. Indeed there are signs for people who believe.” [Surah An’am: 99] 4. Dates Known as the fruit of the desert, dates are one of the most commonly known fruits mentioned within the Holy Quran and are a part of the sunnah as well. Dates are great energy boosters as they contain natural sugars like glucose, sucrose and fructose. It helps regulate a healthy nervous system and studies have shown that it reduces the risk of stroke and other heart-related diseases. It has high iron content and is very useful in treating anemia. It also helps in improving eyesight and helps in curing night blindness “And shake toward you the trunk of the palm tree; it will drop upon you ripe, fresh dates.” [Surah Maryam: 25] 5. Banana The banana is also considered a fruit of paradise, and although today it is seen as a common fruit, it holds numerous health benefits that can help maintain a balanced body. Bananas contain significant amounts of dietary fiber and therefore help in smooth bowel movements and relieve constipation. It is used to treat anemia, is instrumental in developing cells and muscles, and maintains the body’s fluid balance. Cooked banana flowers help in providing relief from painful and excessive bleeding during the menstrual cycle as well as other menstrual disorders. Bananas have polyphenolic, antioxidant compounds that positively impact kidney function and the accumulation of toxins, while also stimulating the proper functioning of kidneys. “And (banana) tree is layered (with fruit)” [Surah Waqiah:29] 6. Fig Figs, often considered a delicacy, are enjoyed both fresh and dried. Because the fruit is pollinated by a tiny wasp where the flowers actually bloom inside the fruit, which produces the tiny seeds inside the fruit that gives it its distinct crunch, fig-trees actually never blossom with flowers. Fig leaves reduce the amount of insulin needed by diabetic patients who have to regularly take insulin injections. The presence of fiber in figs helps to stimulate the elimination of free radicals and other cancer-causing substances, particularly in the colon, since fiber increases the healthy movement of the bowels. Fig leaf tea has been popularly prescribed for various respiratory conditions like bronchitis, and it is also used as a way to prevent and lessen the symptoms of asthmatic patients. “By the fig and the olive” [Surah Teen : 1]