Drug Education Story Number 3: LSD

LSD is one of the most powerful, mood-changing chemicals. It is manufactured from an acid found in a specific fungus that grows on grains. It is then produced in illegal laboratories, mainly in the United States. LSD leads to a serious disconnection from reality. LSD users call an LSD experience a "trip," typically lasting twelve hours or so. When things go wrong, which often happens, it is called a "bad trip," another name for a living hell. Once it starts, there is often no stopping a "bad trip," which can go on for up to twelve hours. In fact, some people never recover from an LSD-induced insanity. One of the worst parts is that an LSD user is unable to tell which sensations are created by the drug and which are part of reality. Some experience severe, terrifying thoughts and feelings, fear of losing control, fear of insanity and death, and despair while using LSD. Many LSD users experience flashbacks, or a recurrence of the LSD trip, often without warning, long after taking LSD.

A Week with LSD, Part 1 (A) I hope my second year of college will be easier than the first. Last year, I had to adjust to the wild parties of college after growing up with very strict parents. I struggled through it, making good grades, but not a lot of friends and definitely no boyfriends. I thought in college it would be easy to finally find a boyfriend, but last year I was too shy to talk to anyone I thought was remotely attractive. This year is already better, though. Classes only started a month ago, but I have a nice apartment, so I don't have to deal with the dorms, and a really awesome internship working with one of my favorite professors in his lab. It doesn't pay anything, but the experience I get will be extremely valuable.

Part 1 (C) I walk in nervous circles around the meeting area at the 9airport. What if he doesn't like me? What if he doesn't think I'm attractive? I try to push these thoughts out of my head as I look up and see him smiling that big, beautiful smile at me. I run up and hug him. I can't believe I'm finally touching him! "Well it's nice to see you, too, Tara," he says, holding me tighter. On the drive home, we talk and it feels like we've known each other forever. He asks me if school is getting better and seems really happy when I say it is. He grew up with strict parents, too, so he knows what it's like to adjust to having your own freedom. We drop his luggage off at my apartment and decide to take a walk in the park nearby. It's a perfect day. The sky is bright blue and there's a gentle breeze. We find a nice hill to sit on. Max wraps his arm around me and I still can't believe I actually get to hang around with him. My heart races when he looks at me. I think he's about to kiss me, but then he says, "Tara, I think I need to tell you something. I just want to be completely honest with you. The reason I was able to come here is that I got discharged." I don't know what to say. I always liked the fact that he was a Marine, but it's not like I suddenly hate him because he got kicked out.

Part 1 (B) In my free time, I like to go to chatrooms online. It's easier to talk to people there than it is at parties. That's where I met Max. We talk almost every night now. He's a Marine stationed in Hawaii. In his profile picture, he has the most amazing smile. I've never seen someone look so happy. When I chat with Max, I don't feel shy or nervous. He makes me comfortable. I just wish he wasn't so far away, which is why I'm so surprised to see his message when I log on to my computer tonight. "Tara, what would you think about me flying out to visit you?" it says. "Yes!" I type back. "I would love that!" "Good. I already bought the ticket. I get there on Monday." Part of me is a little annoyed by this. I don't like that he just bought a ticket without talking to me first. What if I had plans? Mostly though, I just can't wait to finally meet him.

Part 1 (D) "What happened?" I ask. "I, uh, well I failed my drug test." His words hit me in the stomach. I was raised to just say no to drugs. I can't believe he does them. "Look, it's not as bad as it sounds. It was just LSD." "That sounds pretty serious," I say, trying to remember what I've heard about LSD. I know it makes you hallucinate, but that's really all I know. "It's not dangerous like coke or anything. It just helps you feel connected to world. It helps you understand how you fit into the universe. It makes you less lonely." He removes a folded piece of paper from his pocket. It's covered in rows of small, cartoon aliens. He tears off one of the aliens and hands it to me. "See that's all it is. It's not some big scary thing." I flip the paper over in my hand. I can't believe I'm actually holding LSD. "It's an amazing day," he says, looking around. "Beautiful weather. A beautiful park. A beautiful girl sitting next to me." I feel my cheeks burn when he says this. "If we took a hit, it could make it even more beautiful." "I don't know…" "How many times have you told me you're tired of being lonely? Of being bored? Of feeling like you don't understand anything? That little piece of paper can fix all that." He smiles at me. I trust him. He knows how much I hate being lonely. I have a bad feeling in my stomach, but I try to ignore it. I want to try it, just to see if it can help. "Okay, I'll try it," I say.

A Week with LSD, Part 2 (A) "Okay, I'll try it," I say. We each place a piece of paper on our tongues. I feel it dissolve and wait, but nothing happens. "I don't think it's working," I say. "Give it time," Max says. And he's right. I wait and pretty soon it feels like I'm in a whole new universe. The trees bend like they're made out of rubber, their whole trunks swaying back and forth in the wind. A dark shade of purple darkens the sky, slowly spreading out from the clouds like ink dropped in water. As the sky grows darker, I see things move in the shadows. Thousands of snakes and spiders suddenly pour out of them. They're coming for me. I look over at Max for help, but he's smiling happily. He looks as happy as a dead puppet, under the drug's control. "I need to get out of here," I say and stand up, pulling him along behind me. If he says anything, I don't hear it. I lead him back to my apartment, trying to dodge the creatures following me. I lock the door behind me as we get inside.

Part 2 (B) "What's wrong?" Max asks. I look at him and his face looks like a mask. Like he's not really Max. I try to explain what I saw, but my words all come out in a jumble. I don't know how long we were in the park, but it takes several more hours of hiding in my apartment before the effects of the LSD start to fade. By the time it's completely over, it's well past midnight and my body aches like I've just been hit by a truck. "I think I need to go to sleep," I tell him. "I'm not really sure that's the best idea," he says. "You're not going to be able to fall asleep." I don't listen to his warning. Instead, I just give him some blankets so he can sleep on the couch and then collapse into my bed. Max is right. I can't fall asleep. I can't stop thinking about the events of the day. How excited I was at the airport. How surprised I was by the LSD. How easy it was for him to get me to take it. I can't believe that I actually did LSD. I still like him a lot, but I don't know if I can actually date someone who does it. I feel depressed and tired, but I cannot sleep.

Part 2 (B) My alarm clock goes off, telling me to get ready for class. Max is awake when I walk into the living room. "What's the plan for today?" he asks when he sees me. "I have classes," I say. "And I have to go make up the time I missed at my internship yesterday." I was supposed to go after I picked up Max, but that didn't really work out. "That sounds boring. Come on, let's do something fun." "I can't miss more classes. I wasn't even planning on missing them yesterday." Honestly, it does feel kind of nice that he wants to spend more time with me. "Come on, Tara. I've been waiting so long to finally meet you. I want to actually spend time with you." I can't resist him. "Fine," I say with a smile. "I guess I can just say I'm sick."

Part 2 (C) We spend the rest of the day walking around the city. We swap stories from our childhoods. He tells me about the time he tried to run away from home, but got caught because he asked him mom to pack him a lunch. I can't stop laughing. I tell him about the time my dad took me to feed the ducks and I fell into the pond. Neither of us brings up the LSD, and I like it better that way. I take him to my favorite pizza place and order two slices with my favorite toppings: pepperoni and pineapple. Max tries to order plain cheese instead, insisting that pineapple doesn't belong on pizza, but I won't let him. "You have to try it," I say, trying my best to look adorable. "You owe me." "I guess I do," he sighs. We take our slices and sit at one of the tables. Max rushes ahead of me so he can pull my chair out for me. It reminds me of how sweet and polite he was online. He takes a bite of his pizza, then sticks his tongue out. "You don't like it?" I ask. "It's just as gross as I thought it would be," he says as he picks the pineapple off. "You're crazy," I tease. "But I'm glad I tried it. Now I can definitely say I hate pineapple on pizza." "And I can say I don't like LSD." I mean for it to sound like a joke, but we both know it isn't. "You didn't like it?" He sounds hurt. "No. Not at all. It was terrifying." I can't believe he didn't notice that. He puts his hand on mine. "I'm so sorry. That's totally my fault. You just had a bad trip. You need to try it in a better setting. I promise it'll make you feel better." I don't know if I really want to do it again, but I like the way it feels when he holds my hand. That really does make me feel less lonely.