Collocation

Lesson 1 – Family Let’s begin our study of collocations by learning some common expressions about the family. Your parents and siblings (brothers and sisters) are your immediate family – and your extended family includes all your relatives – uncles, cousins, great-aunts, etc. You can use a family tree to diagram the relationships among your family members. A person who is related to you by a long series of connections can be called a distant relative. If you’re lucky, you have a loving family or a close-knit family – these expressions refer to a family that has good relationships, where everyone loves each other and helps each other. If you were raised in a loving family, then you probably had a carefree childhood – that means you had nothing to worry about when you were young. On the other hand, a family in which the relationships are bad or unhealthy can be called a dysfunctional family. If the children experience abuse, poverty, or problems with the law, we can say they had a troubled childhood. Perhaps the parents went through a bitter divorce – that means a separation in which there were bad/angry feelings between the husband and wife. It’s also possible to have a messy divorce, with a prolonged legal battle involving lots of conflicts about the separation of the former couple’s assets (money and possessions). The decisions about the separation of assets are made in the divorce settlement. A family in which there are divorces or separations is sometimes called a broken home. Sometimes the mother and father fight over custody of the children – that refers to who has the primary responsibility of caring for the kids. A judge can grant joint custody – that means the ex- husband and ex-wife share the responsibility – or sole custody to only one parent. For example, a judge might award sole custody to the mother, and the father has to pay child support – regular payments to help with expenses for the kids. If it was a mutual divorce/separation – that means the ex-husband and ex-wife agreed to separate without fighting – then they will probably stay on good terms with each other (meaning to have a polite relationship without conflicts). If a woman gets pregnant without being married or in a relationship, then she will become a single mother. Some women in this situation choose to have an abortion, and others prefer to give the baby up for adoption. The time when the baby is planned to arrive is called the due date – you can also say the baby is due in mid-October, for example. After the woman has the baby (or gives birth to the baby), the baby is given to the adoptive parents, who will raise the child or bring up the child as if it was their own. Sometimes, when the adopted child is older, he or she tries to find their birth mother (biological mother).

Lesson 2 – Relationships When you move to a new city, it can be hard to make friends. You’ll probably have a number of casual acquaintances – people who you know on a basic level, but with whom you don’t have a significant relationship. Over time, some of these may become good friends or close friends – these collocations refer to friends with whom you have an especially strong relationship. Do you believe in love at first sight? That’s when two people meet each other and immediately fall in love – perhaps because they have strong chemistry – this expression describes strong compatibility or connection between two possible romantic partners. Some people believe that their significant other (their boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, or wife) is their soul mate – this is a poetic expression that means that two people are destined to be together. It’s possible for one person to have feelings for another person – this expression is an indirect way to describe romantic feelings – but if the other person doesn’t feel the same way, then the feeling is not mutual. The other person might say “he’s/she’s just not my type” – meaning that they are interested in people of a different type of personality/appearance. Ah, there’s nothing sadder than unrequited love! (Love that is not returned) Some people marry their childhood sweetheart or high school/college sweetheart – this expression refers to a boyfriend or girlfriend from your childhood, teenage, or college years. Other couples are introduced by a mutual friend – one friend that the two people have in common. When the couple is ready to make a commitment, the man proposes to the woman – he asks her to marry him. If the marriage is good, then we say the couple is happily married. Unfortunately, not all love stories have a happy ending. Sometimes a husband or wife has an affair – they have sex with a different person. We can also say that they are cheating on their husband/wife. The expression “have an affair” is typically used only for married couples, and the expression “cheating on” can be used for married couples or for boyfriends/girlfriends.

Lesson 3 – Appearance My best friend Joanna is absolutely gorgeous (extremely beautiful). She has long, sleek, jet-black hair (sleek = smooth and straight, jet-black = perfectly black), pale blue eyes (pale = light color), and a radiant complexion (skin that appears healthy and full of energy). People always compliment her on her hourglass figure (when a woman has large breasts and hips, but a small waist) and ask her what the secret is to maintaining such a slender waist (a thin waist). She has a round face with an upturned nose, and she actually bears a striking resemblance (looks extremely similar) to a famous singer. Joanna could get any guy she wanted – so I was really surprised when she introduced me to her latest boyfriend, who I think is hideously ugly. He has curly, shoulder-length hair that looks rather unkempt (unkempt hair = messy hair, it appears that the person doesn’t take care of their hair). He has a square face and a ruddy complexion (reddish skin). His deep-set eyes (eyes that are far back in the person’s face) are almost hidden under his bushy eyebrows (big eyebrows with lots of hair), and he sports a thick mustache and a huge, shaggy beard (a beard with lots of hair). I guess Joanna doesn’t mind his facial hair (facial hair = beard and/or mustache). His body isn’t bad – he has an athletic build (body with a lot of muscles), with broad shoulders (wide shoulders) and muscular arms. If he would only trim his beard (cut his beard a little shorter) and comb his hair, I suppose he could be considered somewhat attractive (more or less beautiful/handsome).

Lesson 4 – Character & Behavior When I was a teenager, I was painfully shy (extremely shy). I loved reading books, and I had a vivid imagination (had a creative and colorful imagination). My best friend had a more outgoing personality (she liked to be friendly and sociable) and a good sense of humor (ability to make other people laugh). Unfortunately she was also brutally honest, and sometimes her comments hurt my feelings (made me sad, upset, or angry). Although I was fiercely loyal to her, she showed her true colors (revealed her true personality) when she played a prank (did a trick) that humiliated me in front of the class. I bore a grudge (continued feeling angry) against her for years afterwards. Now that I look back on it, I can see that she had low self- esteem (she considered herself inferior) and a bit of a mean streak (a “streak” is a tiny bit of someone’s personality). I've come out of my shell (become less shy) since those days; I have a thicker skin (I’m less sensitive to criticism) and it doesn't bother me when people speak their minds (say exactly what they think, without considering the effects of the words on others). My biggest flaw is that I have a tendency to be arrogant – some say I have a superiority complex (consider myself superior to others). I’ll admit that it is hard for me to swallow my pride (stop being arrogant) and recognize when I've been mistaken about something. My resolution for the New Year is to make a more concerted effort to put others first (consider the needs of other people more important than my own).

Lesson 5 – Feelings I experienced a roller coaster of emotions when my son was born (many different emotions one after another). During my wife’s pregnancy, I was ridiculously excited about the prospect of becoming a dad. On the big day, I’d imagined that everything would go smoothly and we’d be blissfully happy – but there were complications during the delivery and my wife had to have emergency surgery while I waited in the reception area, worried sick (very worried). As time went by, I got increasingly anxious because the doctors weren’t telling me anything. After two hours I was seething with anger (ready to explode with anger), and I and shouted at one of the nurses. Then the security guards came and escorted me out of the hospital. My wife was visibly disappointed (it was obvious that she was disappointed) that I wasn’t by her side when she woke up from surgery. She didn’t say anything – she’s not really one to show her feelings; she prefers to bottle up her emotions (keep her emotions hidden inside her) – but I knew I had let her down and I was terribly sorry that I had lost my temper (lost control and shown anger). The months that followed were tough. My wife became deeply depressed, and I too was an emotional wreck (a person who is very sad, confused, and upset) as I tried to juggle the demands of work and family life. But now things are starting to turn around – I’ve been pleasantly surprised at the all help we’ve gotten from our friends and neighbors. I’m just immensely grateful that my wife and son are healthy, and sometimes I’m overwhelmed with emotion as I reflect on how lucky we are (when emotion is so strong that it’s difficult to think or speak).

Lesson 6 – Houses and Apartments I recently spent a month on vacation – but instead of staying in a hotel, I looked for a short-term rental (a place to live that can be rented for a short period of time). I ended up sharing a two-bedroom apartment – that’s an apartment with two bedrooms, a living room, and a kitchen – with some friends. It was actually cheaper than renting a studio apartment (an apartment with only one big room) all by myself. The apartment was on the top floor of a five-story building (that’s a building with five floors) and it had a balcony overlooking the ocean (that means you can see the ocean from the balcony). From the roof, we also had a nice view of the city skyline (this is another expression used when you can see something from a certain place). The apartment had recently been remodeled/renovated – meaning it was fixed up and improved – and was fully furnished, so it already had furniture (beds, tables, etc.) and appliances (refrigerator, stove, etc.) We loved the spacious living room (the room was big), but unfortunately the bedrooms were rather cramped (small and uncomfortable). It was nice to spend a month there, but by the end of the trip I started to feel homesick – that’s when you feel sad because you miss your life at home. I’d really like to have a place of my own so that I’m not throwing away money on rent every month, but there’s a real shortage of affordable housing (houses/apartments that are reasonably priced) in my city. Even if I stay away from the upscale neighborhoods (areas where rich people live), I’d still have to take out a mortgage (borrow money from the bank, in order to buy a house) and it’ll take me more than 30 years to pay it off. But still, I’m gonna start saving up for a down payment (an initial payment on a big purchase). Someday, when I do move into a new place, I’ll be sure to throw a housewarming party (a party to celebrate living in a new house/apartment).